Watch this space for the latest from GWD HQ, and keep your FOMO to a BM (that means Bare Minimum).

Back on National Hot Fudge Sundae Day, we ran a round called “#SundaeFunday” where all the questions dealt with items that you use to build an ice cream sundae. We asked about a ballet called “Whipped Cream,” ice cream served at the White House, a singer named Cherry Vanilla, and, of course, a spoon. More specifically, the world’s largest steel spoon found outside the museum dedicated to Uri Geller. Let’s dig in a bit more on that dude.

Uri Geller, the self-described illusionist and psychic, should’ve disappeared from the public eye about five decades ago. The man who built his reputation claiming that he could bend spoons with his mind famously…failed to do that during a 1973 appearance on “The Tonight Show,” and the segment was so embarrassingly awful that even the New York Times described it as “a legendary immolation.” 

But instead of ruining him, or exposing him as nothing but a con man with impressive chest hair, that disastrous segment made him an even bigger name. He was booked on another talk show almost immediately afterward, and onto another one after that, and now, almost 50 years later, Uri Geller is still out there doing Uri Geller things. 

In the past three years alone, he’s set an official Guinness World Record for the “World’s Largest Steel Spoon,” which is on display outside his own Uri Geller Museum in Tel Aviv, Israel. The museum has had a stop-start launch due to the pandemic, but he still personally gives tours to show off and blab about the 200-plus objects on display. “Ninety percent of the items you see here were gifts from people throughout my career,” he told The Jewish Star. “About 5 percent of the items I bought in Sotheby and Christie auctions because they were connected to me in some way. Most of the rest I bought in shops.” (Cool! Show us more of your crap!) 

In January 2020, he sent an unsolicited letter to the British government, offering them his “genuine psychic powers.” He added that, although he was “busy organizing the opening of the Uri Geller Museum” he would “consider a move back to Britain for the right position.” (Boris Johnson’s government made some absolutely bonkers decisions, but apparently bringing Geller in for an interview wasn’t one of them.) 

Later that year, he dropped his two decade-long fight against Nintendo, and gave them his blessing to re-release the Kadabra Pokemon card. That’s right: dude has been fighting against Pokemon FOR TWENTY YEARS, and filed multiple lawsuits against Nintendo, alleging that they used his likeness to create Kadabra – a psychic-type Pokemon who carries a silver spoon — and “turned him into an evil occult character.” 

But he randomly decided to shrug all that off, and he claims he did it for the children. “I am truly sorry for what I did 20 years ago,” he tweeted. “Kids and grownups I am releasing the ban. It’s now all up to Nintendo to bring my #kadabra #pokemon card back. It will probably be one of the rarest cards now! Much energy and love to all!”

Geller has also claimed that he used his mind to free the Ever Given, when the ship got stuck sideways in the Suez Canal (“We moved the ship!!!!” he tweeted. “I believe in my powers and I believe in yours!!!!”) Last week he begged England women’s soccer coach Sarina Wegman to let him meet with her team to help them win the Euros — but he swore that he would not “interfere with football again paranormally.” (Wegman didn’t take him up on it, and England won the tournament on their own, thankyew.) 
And JUST YESTERDAY, Geller warned Vladmir Putin that if he used nuclear weapons, Geller would “use every last molecule of [his] Mind Power” to prevent an attack. Great. We’re all doomed.