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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Thursday, May 14, 2015
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My Objective Opinion
WillSalerno

Shit fucking sucks. First, Excel fucking sucks. I get that individuals might find it useful, but no institution should. You fuck*** ass***es at GWD? Get it to-fucking-gether. Second, Heir To the Jedi, god you suck so fucking hard. Much like the author (Kevin Hearne), who was paid money to WRITE ABOUT STAR WARS, I cannot put a coherent thought together about this book. Here is a list. Hearne took Luke Skywalker and made him more of a bitch and less believable as a hero. Vader:Anakin::Luke from movies:Luke in HTTJ. Way to Lucas it up, you asshole. HTTJ employed an interesting narrative perspective, First Person Ombitchient.
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At age 5, Will decided he wanted to be a scientist.

At age 29, Will became a scientist.

At age 30, Will realized he never wanted to be a scientist, he wanted to be in Starfleet.

At age 31, Will determined Starfleet was not an option.

Will is currently pursuing a career as a Time Lord.


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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Thursday, May 07, 2015
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William Jefferson "Bill" Clinton Was Born in Hope, AK
Akash

Clinton was born William Jefferson Blythe III on August 19, 1946, at Julia Chester Hospital in Hope, Arkansas.[2][3] His father, William Jefferson Blythe, Jr. (1918–1946), was a traveling salesman who died in an automobile
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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Friday, April 24, 2015
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Joke About Killing Will
Metta World Pizza

Hello Hefleys. Thanks for having me. Will's gonna be back next week. I'm just here trying to read properly. Write poorly. And not fuck things up too much. If I did, then I'm not really sorry. Whatever it's a game. Life goes on. I don't have time to worry about Montana. I guess if you were truly offended then I'll tell Will to give you a hand job. That's the most I can do. I really did enjoy subbing. Something I only do on rare occasions. Because I'm busy. And genuinely have better things to do. Like playing quiz and drinking way more. Hopefully I'll see you soon. Just
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I read great


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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Saturday, April 18, 2015
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Janksaber
The Greatest Quizmaster Of All Time

J.J. is boss of all snacks. Before I started quiz Thursday I offered to cancel and instead just lead a two-hour conversation about the Star Wars trailer that dropped. The strong (but not unanimous) decision was to proceed with quiz, so we will have the discussion now. When the first trailer came out, I voiced my concerns about the cross-saber. (I also suggested that J.J. buy us snacks, which he did. Thanks, bro.) I said the design was impractical and that it looked a bit janky. Turns out I was correct. Here is
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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Saturday, April 11, 2015
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The Universe Is Shaped Exactly Like The Earth
The Greatest Quizmaster Of All Time

Flat and cold, as is your mom. If you hang around quiz long enough, team names start to repeat themselves. Trying to be clever every week is exhausting, even for me. Last night we had a bevy of great team names, and I want you all to know how much I appreciate it. Every week I end the blog with an imperative to make me laugh, and last night you all delivered. 3 More Til Fas10 Furious: Like the Fast and Furious movies, this name works on multiple levels. Unlike the Fast and Furious movies, these boners shit the bed at the end, failing to deliver on the perfect game they had through Round 7. Blueberry Nipples: Just a wonderful combination
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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Saturday, April 04, 2015
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It's A Blog!
The Greatest Quizmaster Of All Time

I'm back, but only until I go to Fast and Furious 7.  Thanks to Jamey for covering last week while I was in Vegas (the reason I let Some Dumb Joke About Indiana win). I only spent one night gambling and was thus barely able to lose all my money. Luckily, I found a Blackjack Switch table, which turned out to be a super efficient financial transfer mechanism. Speaking of bad mathematical decisions, let's talk primes. I asked last night what the sum was of the two largest two-digit prime numbers, and everyone failed hard. I mocked you all harshly, but I am wondering how tricky it actually is. Let's see! Even numbers, out. 99, duh. 97,
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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Monday, March 30, 2015
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It's good to try it on the other side from time to time
The Greatest Quizmaster Of All Time

It was fun sitting in for Will.  I hope it didn't suck too badly.   I figure when I sub for him, y'all just appreciate what a master on the mic he really is. I am nowhere near as clever or entertaining.  Neither is my blog.  I haven't subbed for a while, so I had trouble getting the site to post the blog, not that anyone reads it.  At first I put up the Wikipedia article on Pub Quiz just to be a smart ass.  I got called to the principal's office and told to do it right, so here you go.  Are you still reading? There were 13 teams, so I actually had to work.  The quiz was tough. We
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Hefley's
138 W Gray St
Houston, TX
77019
[Thursday 8:00 pm]
Saturday, March 21, 2015
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A Quick Meditation on Team Names
The Greatest Quizmaster Of All Time

Or, How to Fuck with a QM. Jamey is covering for me next week, and I want to make sure you treat him right so he comes back.  "But Will," you says to Mable you says, "Jamey is a jerk. He always wins the bonus beers and his team always wins. You routinely make fun of him and he has a ugly butt and his butt smells and he likes to kiss his own butt. Why would you want us to treat him right?" Good question quizzers, and there is really only one answer. We want to keep this shit in the family. The last thing anyone wants is some jerk QM coming in with "enthusiasm" or "fresh ideas like more dance offs" or "basic respect for other
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