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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Tuesday, May 19, 2015
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The Night I Pronounced Everything Correctly
Quizmaster Soss

Now I'm not going to claim that I'm all-knowing (except when it comes to quizzing), but I knew deep down in my fallopian tubes that tonight was going to be a high-scoring buzzer-beater game. It was in the air. It was stirring my loins.  I just knew.  And sure enough, here we are creeping up on a 90-pointer.  I suppose it helps that I was giving out bonus points, but I just could see the focus and competitive romance in your guys' eyes tonight.   So with only a 1-point spread, Christian Dads Who Vape eeked out a first place win tonight!  Aside from the last three rounds, they tied every round with our 2nd place team, First Rodeo,
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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
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The Night I'll Never Wash My Boobs Again
Quizmaster Soss

There were a few special guests in the crowd this week at your neighborhood bar named Sue. Firstly, our buddy David Beckham dropped in to guest host on a round and sign autographs on my breasts, so that was not only cool, but also it totally happened. Secondly, my loving and wholesome mother showed up in town because she wanted to find out about this famous Bar Named Sue and their world-class pub quiz hosted by her favorite son. She admitted to sandbagging her team and told me my music wasn't clean enough, but she at least enjoyed the food. Last but not least... actually yes least... a couple of the sexiest local quizmasters showed up to prove they still got some pubchops even without the
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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Tuesday, May 05, 2015
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The Night I Served Two Thousand MCs
Quizmaster Soss

One day when I worked at a snack shop, this guy - obviously on some kind of drugs - comes up and says "Dude, I need two eggs - hold the seahorse." I looked at him for a second and go "Two eggs? Like, scrambled eggs?" And he goes "No man, just crack them into a cup and give me the cup." So I put the eggs in the cup and try to figure out how I'm about to regret it, and I just gave him his order. He gave me 20 dollars, picked up the cup, and goes "YOU WERE NEVER GIVEN THE LIFE YOU DESERVED. I WILL NOW SET YOU FREE!" and pours the two eggs onto the sidewalk and walks off. But twenty bucks is twenty bucks. Tonight's first place winner was First Rodeo and second place was
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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Wednesday, April 29, 2015
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Here's A Story For Those Of You With Writer's Block
Quizmaster Soss

I have an idea for a book and any of you are free to take this idea and run with it. It's the story of old but determined Greg and his caretaker Jane who helps him learn to fit in with the world. Greg lives in a wheelchair and has trouble understanding the people around him but he's slowly learning even at his age. He has trouble getting around but he's figuring that out little by little too. He can't contribute much to the world, but he knows his day will come when he'll be needed. Somethingsomethingsomething drama starts happening and it turns out Greg is uniquely qualified to save humanity because... he's a gorilla. AW SNAP. Suddenly Greg's more primal instincts kick in and
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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Tuesday, April 21, 2015
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The Night I Learned I'm On My Phone Too Much
Quizmaster Soss

I saw tonight's visual round and finished it before I even had time to get a dick pic with it. At first I thought I was pretty smart and clearly a tech genius, but the more I thought about it, the worse I felt about myself. Instead of learning another language or memorizing romantic poetry to recite to a bedfull of women, I'm filling my giant brain up with a photographic rolodex of app icons. And not even ones to be proud of. Yes I had a Candy Crush phase; I won't pretend to deny it. But I also now have an unending phase of regretting that month of my life - and this will stay with me until I die. But I'm not alone. You guys rocked that round also, and I'm equally ashamed of us all. By
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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
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The Night Of A Mid-April Winter Storm Warning
Quizmaster Soss

I'm gonna go ahead and call it: tonight's quiz gang was the best looking crowd in all of Salt Lake City tonight. I bring the average up quite a bit on my own, but let's not pretend you're not all hot pieces of ass. When the outside gets blustery and April rainy, the only place I'd want to be is quizzing with you dorks at A Bar Named Sue. The knockout trio of Maggie, Hollywood, and Tink is worth it alone, but they also bring the treats and the brew... not to mention all the prizes and giving me a microphone to spew my racist rants. One day I'll get around to doing that... have your phones ready to make me a YouTube star. Congrats to Babez 4 Daze and their narrow
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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Wednesday, April 08, 2015
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The Night You Learned Being A Baby Koala Kinda Sucks
Quizmaster Soss

In Round Four, we found out baby koalas eat their mom's poop to build up immunity to toxins. And so I got to wondering whose poop could *I* eat in order to gain immunity and/or super powers? If Jedi Masters were real things, I think they'd be my first choice because I might absorb some Fecal Force into my system. My second choice is a monk. They're the closest thing we have to actual superheroes, so maybe I'd get some mysterious Tibetan healing power. Speaking of the power of poop, did you know that you can turn it into wifi? I'm not making that up. Our quiz winners tonight
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A Bar Named Sue (Highland)
3928 S Highland Dr
Salt Lake City, UT
84108
[Tuesday 8:00 pm]
Wednesday, April 01, 2015
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The Night We Honored Mr. T
Quizmaster Soss

I was excited to do a round on Mr. T tonight because I truly feel like I've spent too much of my life not giving him the attention he deserves.  The man is a national treasure and you'd be a better person for changing your facebook pic to his headshot. Tonight we also gave props to our first place team, Moo Goo Gai Pan, who I think named their team that just because they know I like saying it.  Second place went to Cocaine 4 Errbody! and they still win a fantastic prize ($40!) because the people at A Bar Named Sue love having us come out and stink the place up. I also want to give some bittersweet advice to team Sean Harley
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