• Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Friday, Jul 22, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

That's Right I'm In It
Osman

I'm getting really tired of these bigots, yo. This Trump guy is pandering to the dumbest segment of voters and it seems like these white supremacists find some kind of validation from it. Well I got a message for you big boys: suck my brown, government-assistance having dick. I love welfare. I FUCKING LOVE IT MAN! Things we learned at quiz: 1. Anthony Bourdain gets really, really high. 2. A lot of people think that Bob Dylan has a song called "Work", which would make sense but it's also funny to think of him singing "work, work, work, work, work, work, he said me haffi work, work, work, work, work, work" 3. Tiger Woods might be a sleazebag, but what about
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Jul 14, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

Back up in your ass with the resurrection
Osman

I'm babysitting my nieces. They are the shit. First I whooped their asses as Candyland and they didn't even get upset. Then we watched Mother Goose Club (which sucks). I suggested Magic School Bus but I was overruled. Then we agreed to watch the Office. Yea that's right. Cuz my nieces are the shit. The 5-year-old wanted to watch Benihana Christmas and the 3-year-old wanted to watch the one where Michael drives his car into a lake. So we're compromising and watching both :) Things we learned at quiz: 1. Fuck the KKK. Fuck em all day long. Hate speech is not free speech. 2. Fuck CR7 too. I can't believe France lost that shit. Absolute disaster. 3.
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Jul 07, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

Gold Jacket, Green Jacket, who gives a shit?
Osman

I don't want to go into some big political thing on a blog for pub quizzes but for Christ's sake, will everybody just stop shooting people for like a few days at least? Thanks. I'm watching an Ali G episode right now. He just pitched his idea for ice cream gloves to Donald Trump. When the ice cream drips, it gets on the glove instead of your hands, so your hands are warm and mess-free. Trump wasn't having it. All I ever want to watch is Ali G wasting Donald Trump's time. Things we learned at quiz: 1. Eating a 144 eggs wouldn't just be gross but would probably kill you. 2. I just learned about the alternate definition for "quarry". And now I'm seeing it
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Jun 30, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
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It's after 6. What am I, a farmer?
Osman

30 Rock theme quiz at the Maple Leaf last night. 24 teams came through and really brought the energy. Several Frank hats were peppered throughout the crowd. I even spotted a"TGS with Tracy Jordan" hoodie. Plus, Matt turned 30. At the 30 Rock quiz! Happy birthday, homie. First place took home $225 cash money, winner take all. I did bring a consolation prize for second place though. It was a trucker hat that said "Hot Mess" on it. I got it from a bacherlorette party. Don't ask me how. I gotta say, I like 30 Rock. I've seen the show a few times. But yall are insane. How the hell would you remember what year Kenneth was born in> Or that Frank was wearing
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Jun 23, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

He held it too long and died from a burst bladder
Osman

That's gotta be top 5 worst ways to go. Quick plug: WE ARE HOLDING A 30 ROCK THEME QUIZ HERE AT THE MAPLE LEAF NEXT WEEK ON THURSDAY 6/30, PLEASE REGISTER ONLINE. Alright, cool. Yoooooooooooooo Cavs won. Gotdamn Lebron. It's like the first time having a small dick was an advantage since Sparta. You did it man. Things we learned at quiz: 1. The Browns are garbage. 2. LBJ had the most poorly named dogs all time. Beagles named Him and Her. That's lame as shit. 3. Puck you. 4. There's at least one person in the world who knows who Tycho Brahe is. 5. Ben and Jerry's is like three years too late to release a Linsanity ice cream.
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Jun 16, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
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Damn Osman
Osman

Back at it with the Maple Leaf quiz. It had been quite awhile since I hosted at Maple Leaf. The Stanley Cup has yet again been hoisted by the Penguins and fans have retreated to their dwellings in order to plan during the offseason, hoping that this season will be the year they can shit talk until the end. Quiz, as usual, was euphoric. There were two people on a Tinder date. I knew because their team name was (First) Tinder Date. They left just after Round 7. Presumably to fuck. Godspeed bro, we're all rooting for you. Also, true homie Ross came through. His team was One and a Half Jews, which kind of sounds like a sitcom
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Jun 02, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
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Throwing Panties At The Prime Minister
CLAY-TON, The Impostor

Tonight we had a most unique R7. In this second audio round, we were supplied with a 2-minute clip of John Oliver on This Week Tonight! talking about the recent controversy in Canada known as Elbowgate, which concerns Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and something he did with his elbows that I have read about but don’t quite understand. I think it involves hockey, donuts, syrup, bacon, and the Grace Under Pressure album by Rush.   What I do understand is that a lot of people in America really really really like Mr. Trudeau. Take my friend John. John’s a funny guy, one of those rare people who is equally funny in both real life and on social media. Recently he’s
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Apr 07, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

Sunglasses and Advil
Osman

Last night was mad real. NHL regular season is coming to a close which means the lubefest that is playoffs is about to begin. At least that's what you would think from the moans. I gotta say, this teen movie fan-fic category has got to be one of the more perverted rounds we've ever had. Especially the part where Ron and Ginny from Harry Potter fucked. They're siblings! Call me a prude but I draw the line at incest. "Fuck the Draft" and "Fuck the Police" as well. John Paul II could try all he wanted to stop Madonna but nobody can deny her flavor. Nigeria has a film industry and they produced over 1,800 moves in 2013. Just dwell on that
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Mar 31, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
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Cuz it's your dog!
Osman

I gotta say, I'm getting old, man. My hearing's going, my hair's falling out, I'm getting sick like every 3 weeks. When a parasite emerges from my midsection like Alien, don't say I didn't warn you. Things we learned at quiz: 1. Nebraskas sucksssssssss 2. Tasmania is not in Africa. 3. There were a lot of alliterative president's names in the early 1900s. Calvin Coolidge, Herbert Hoover, Woodrow Wilson. We gotta bring this trend back. 4. My mom used to make huge batches of bing cherry jam and give people jars of it. We didn't really learn this at quiz but it's something I thought of when bing cherries came up and I found it fitting
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Mar 24, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
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The five foot assassin with the roughneck business
Osman

We had a particularly heady quiz at the MLP last night. And by heady, I mean low-brow. And by quiz, I mean orgy. On a positive note, my computer only crashed 4 times! HUZZAH!!!!! I'd just like to point out to all the people that guessed that Thomas Jefferson never had kids: it's pretty well-documented that he had kids. And they weren't white. I said that last night and a lot of people groaned. But you guys need to realize that you're groaning at FACTS! A little Montell Jordan always throws them off the scent. Portland vs San Francisco in the showdown of ultimate hipster meccas. Spoiler alert: There is no winner. We are all losers. Round
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Mar 17, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

It was only a three-and-a-half-hour virus.
Osman

How's that for an obscure Fresh Prince reference? Last night was tough. I don't know what happened to me but I was weak as hell and feverish like some sort of sickboy. But quiz must continue and I gotta say, I handled it like a champ. I even went out afterwards. It was Patty's Day, I didn't really have a choice. It was gross though. For real, what a shitshow. Things we learned at quiz:  1. I don't care who you are; everybody loves Sade. 2. MLK is to black America as Mufasa is to Pride Rock. 3. Kevin Kline has slipped from the memories of this country's youth. 4. So has Kurt Russell. 5. Believe it or not, North Korea tries to
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Mar 10, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

I miss the old Kanye
Osman

I tried sooooo so hard. I got there early and I was on top of everything at a quick pace. And through sheer focus and determination, I only went about 10 minutes over. Hooray for meeeeeeeeee! Things we learned at quiz: 1. An IED would make the worst IUD ever. 2. George Clinton was not a bluegrass singer. 3. Silicon is an element and silicone is found in titties. 4. Imelda Marcos held it down. 5. People think that Mr. Rogers sounds like the Beatles. In the end, only one victor could rise up from the cloud of blood and gore. And that victor was "Chik-fil-a-tio" Second place came down to a tie-breaker and "Squad Goals" edged "The
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Mar 03, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

The shit show to end all shit shows
Osman

Honestly, last night was the first time I ever had trouble with a quiz. It seemed like everything that could go wrong did. And despite being cornered by adversity, I only went about as long as I usually do. Considering I started about 20 minutes late, I think that's what people refer to in the industry as "clutch". Take note, Lebron. Things we learned at quiz: 1. Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer. I don't care if he wasn't "alive" then, don't come at me like that with facts, bruh. Besides, where's the long-form birth certificate, Cruz? I need some sort of documentation to prove you weren't created in a lab with the purpose of sterilizing humanity. Not like actual sterilization,
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Feb 25, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

"Atmosphere finally made a good record." Yea right, that shit almost sounds convincing.
Osman

Saw Atmosphere after quiz last night. It's probably the third time I've seen Slug live and I gotta say, 43-year-old white guy spits a better live show than most rappers out there today. Even my friend who hates rap liked it. And she hates rap. Things that happened during quiz: 1. wtf is "Scream Queens" 2. wtf is "Trumbo" 3. John Mayer and Deepak Chopra are basically interchangable. 4. Even if your answer is "Gerard Depardieu (The guy from 'The Artist')" doesn't mean that's the dude who was in the "The Artist". 5. Ben Franklin, Alexander Hamilton, and Henry Ford were never POTUS. And for real, Henry Ford? Dude wasn't even a politician
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Feb 18, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
Quiz Venue Logo

Cocaine in a Can
Osman

Yo guys, I know yall are wasted. And I know you're all highly competitive. And I know there's a lot of sports on TV and the testosterone is flowing hard. But let's remember to be civil. Think about all that humanity has overcome, everything we collectively have endured and all the progress we've made. For all of that experience to culminate into a dick-measuring contest at pub quiz is to spit at the entirety of human existence. We're better than that. Also, make sure to tip the bartenders and waitstaff cuz they don't really like me either. If ¡Que Chingados!, a fake beer that tastes and acts like cocaine, actually existed, that shit would fly off the shelves. Tall-boys
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  • Quiz Image
The Maple Leaf Pub
514 Elgin St
Houston, TX
77006
Thursday, Feb 11, 2016
[Thursdays @ 8:00 pm]
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Please Say the Baby
Osman

WeezyFest 2K16 kicked off last night. Don't get burned. While it is correct that Britney Spears had a song about prerogatives, Bobby Brown had a slightly more famous song about prerogatives. It's Bobby, bitch. I gotta say that the best team name I've heard in a long time is "Halal, is it meat you're looking for?". It was probably cheating business, but still not bad. I even sang it once into the microphone. Sorry about that. The main thing I want to say is my friends and I have this thing we say to each other. You see, once upon a time, my friend Rachel went on like a 80 mile bike ride and when she showed us a route on a map, one of us (don't even remember who)
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