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Hotel Congress
311 E Congress St
Tucson, AZ 85701
Tuesdays: 8:00 PM
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11:07 AM, April 10, 2013
What Did The Coxwain Say To Margaret Thatcher? Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! 94

Super Anovas 90

Twerking For The Weekend 83

Thatcher Snatchers 77

The Heroes Of Canton 77

The Franimals 77

Brian's Cat 76

Uncles With Benefits 76

The Never Nudes 75

Cowpersons Of Reason 74

Game Of Boners 74

Roper's Next 73

Kevin, Ware's Your Leg? 68

What Do You Want, Woman? 64

It Ain't A Lemon Party Without Old Dick 61

2-R-Us 60

Generic Topical Pun Name 58

Drove through A Fog To Get Here 43

I Hate It When My Schwartz Gets Twisted 39

It's So Fluffy 17



Quiz Schedule
Wednesdays at Trident Bar and Grill, 8PM
Julio (Jean-Luc)

If there is one thing you must know about Jean-Luc (or "Julio" for those of you feeling saucy) it is that he loves scotch sours. Doesn't matter what kind of scotch goes into the sour, be it well scotch, Glenlivet, or Laphroaig. Because when he drinks it neat, he only drinks Talisker 18 year. Why is he telling you this? So you can buy him a scotch sour. He has no shame. But know this. Your buying him a scotch won't get you any free points for the night. But it will help him remember your name the following morning.

Originally a native from Los Angeles (Go Dodgers!), Jean-Luc has been living in Tucson close to four years. Love, not a desire to drive down property values, brought him here. And when he's not complaining about the heat, he's complaining about the cold. But he doesn't complain often, except when Ned Colletti makes a horrible trade or a questionable signing. Yes, he enjoys baseball. But he loathes the San Francisco Giants. More than he does gin and tonics.

This is the part of the bio where he lists favorites - favorite films, favorite musical artists, favorite books. After you gloss over the list, somehow you are supposed to know more about him than you did before. Though he doubts that. If you really want to get to know your quizmaster, just approach him. Talk to him. He's the one behind the microphone, mispronouncing words and making awful jokes that fall flat. He doesn't bite. Unless you want him to.

As promised, his favorites (which constantly change)!


  • Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller
  • The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery
  • The Shock Doctrine by Naomi Klein
  • 20 Poemas de Amor y Una Cancion Desesperada by Pablo Neruda
  • San Manuel Bueno, martir by Miguel de Unamuno

Music Artists:

  • Wire
  • The Ex
  • Tito Puente
  • Parliament/Funkadelic
  • Fugazi


  • Dr. Strangelove, Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
  • Night of the Living Dead (1968)
  • Viridiana
  • Bicycle Thieves
  • Die Hard

I was given multiple reports of a hobo approaching random teams during our first break, sitting on empty seats and attempting to make small hobo talk. Sure enough, I spotted him doing just that. But when I glanced up, he was gone. This hobo just vanished into the night. Gone with the same winds that likely  lifted him from his home under an I-10 underpass and brought him into downtown Tucson.

Curious about this hobo, I asked a quizzer about him. "So that was the hobo? The black guy sitting at your table?" With a puzzled look on her face, she replied, "Black guy? The hobo wasn't black. He was white!" "Oh," I responded. "That must have been a lot of grime on the hobo." Now, am I racist? (The answer is "yes," but work with me here for storytelling purposes.) In no way did I mean to imply that black people are dirty or look dirty. I know how melanin functions in determining skin color. It was an easily misconstrued observation. Besides, I can't really be racist. Most of the best athletes I know are black! . . . ah, shit. Does THAT make me an "accidental racist?" (No, I'm totally a racist. Totally.)

Caribbean Joe and Island Amy will return next week to right this ship. Not a slave ship! Shit, uh...let's try that again.

Caribbean Joe and Island Amy will return next week to whip this quiz into shape. Whip...into....damn it. Okay, one more time...

Caribbean Joe and Island Amy will return next week for more Geeks Who Drink pub quiz at Hotel Congress! (So far so good.) So gather the remaining three-fifths of your team and- GODDAMNIT! Fuck it. Just go.