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Salt Lake City, UT 84115
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Cranky old man here, taking over the blog for the night for Dr. Nick, who is jet-lagged, sleep-deprived, low on blood sugar, not drinking enough liquor, and too busy with something he calls a “day-job” to write this blog. Speaking of which, what the fuck is a blog anyhow? He asked me to give a recap of the Geeks Who Drink pub quiz that was way too-loud and full of profanity all night.
That young bastard sure likes the f-word.
Anyways, you may remember me from round four, in which pop-culture bullshit was explained by an old person. What a bunch of rubbish. As if we old people are so clueless and talk like we don't know what's going on...
WHO ARE YOU BASTARDS AND WHY ARE YOU ON MY LAWN?!
That god-damned “quizmaster” was talking about politics and the hippity-hop music. John Mayer, Katy Perry, Will-I-Am... BAAHHH! Not a single one of them is any match for ol' blue eyes. And we never cared who he was partnering with, because he was making love with ALL THE WOMEN. That's right, real stars just have the sex all the time.
And another thing! You kids and your damn team names are filthy! Talking about Elisa's new boobs, Asexual masturbation fantasies, The legitimately raped... In my day, all rape was legitimate! And you didn't talk about it!
I don't get what fascination you kids have with Nick's mom. She's a respectable lady!
The second-place team, See-thru Stu and the Invisibles confuse me as much as a Rubik's Cube. Are you some sort of super-heroes?
Congratulations to Chicks, Dicks, and Stevie Nicks for your win, even though your team name pays homage to that hippy whore.
Now clean up your act, and call your grandmother more often. I'm sure she's worried sick about you bastards.