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The Bulldog Uptown
2549 Lyndale Ave S.
Minneapolis, MN 55405
Mondays: 8:00 PM
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7:22 AM, June 18, 2013


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Scores

Dinosaurs!	89

Smarty Pints	85

Eat my blumpkin pie	77

Hiphopapatomus vs. Rhymenausaurous	74

Twisted Fister	74

Miss Utah's Speech Coaches	73

Maroon 3	72

Can't Stanz ya	70

Lizzie's Understanding of Baseball	65

Where's Jerrod?!?!	65

Good Question	63

Lucky 13	59

Fisted Twister	59

Skinny bitch	46

Medium Well Bits	46

Better bring out the experts!

Nick

Tonight was one of our most academic quizzes to date! We started right out of the gate with a visual round that asked you to identify the active chemical ingredient in a bunch of house hold products. Sure, I could tell you that the Cubs are set to beat the Miami Gators in the 2015 world series* but I wold never have been able to identify the active ingredient in Borax. I probably would have just huddle in the fetal position in the corner and repeated lines from Billy Madison (chlorophyl, more like BORE-ophyl. Lucky I was the quiz master, rather than the quiz taker tonight.

*this is the latest in a long line of Back to the future references from me, try to keep up.

The hits just came coming when we gave you a round asking for the translation of yiddish words. Now, I am certainly not fluent, but I've seen enough Mel Brooks movies to pick up a thing or two. Let's just say that a few schmendricks came into the quiz with a lot of chutzpuh, but it got so meshuga that they lost track of the questions and had to kvetch.

Round one brought us a bunch of questions about the good old stars and stripes. My favorite question focused on the stars of the movie Stripes (you see what I did there?) Let's talk about Bill Murray and Harold Ramis for a second, has there ever been a better/more reliable duo for coming up with amazing comedy movies? Let's look at the track record, Stripes, Ghostbusters, Groundhog day... the hits just keep coming.

Our music round brought us a bunch of songs that were the opposite of each other. Bye Bye Bye and Hello. Stand By Me and Don't Stand So Close to Me. Luckily, we didn't play any Nickelback songs. There are a lot of good bands in the world, but I'd be hard pressed to find the diametric opposite of the worst band ever.

More high class rounds! We gave you one all about literary protagonists. In college, some friends and I tossed around the idea of having a protagonist party, where everyone came as their favorite literary protagonist. The problem, as we saw it, would have been that no one would be able to recognize the character unless they had made a movie adaptation of the book. Other than that, it would have just led to a bunch of weird philosophical discussions about what a protagonist is, and what they represented. There is not enough weed in the world to make that party fun.

Round brought us questions based loosely on everyone's favorite duckling nephews, Huey Dewey and Louie. Strangely, no questions on Huey Lewis and the news. Luckily, you all got your fill of 80's has-beens with our question about Louie Anderson. I can't believe he signed up to a diving reality show and couldn't even get one dive in! More surprising, there are 2 celebrety diving reality shows. WTF?

In any case, thanks for skipping the finale of "celebrities in danger: walking the high board II" to come out to the quiz tonight. I promise you, you had a better time than the people watching that shit (plus it's available on TiVo.) We'll see everyone next week!

The Bulldog Uptown
2549 Lyndale Ave S.
Minneapolis, MN 55405
Mondays: 8:00 PM
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7:33 AM, June 11, 2013


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Scores

Team Dickbutt	84

My Couch Pulls Out... But I don't	79

Fantastic Sams	76

Twisted Fister	72

Channing Tatum O'Neil	67

Good Question	67

Summer George	66

I'd Wiretap that	61

Rarebitz	57

Soul Patrol	51

Maroon 2	43

Drunk Ass Chicks	21

The Team Formerly Known as the knights who say ni	10

Zee	2

They don't talk too much about blowjobs on the Discovery channel...

Nick

which, in my opinion, is something that the Blood Hound gang messed up a bit on. It doesn't matter, because we came through for the bloodhound gang. First, we had that round where we discussed a whole bunch of famous BJs (though not the kinds that made Monica Lewinsky famous, you perverts.) Instead, we asked about stuff like airplanes and Bo Jackson. Yeah, we are classing up the joint.

Then, lucky for you Blood Hound Gang fans (but unluckily for those of you who were not 7th grade boys in the late 90's) we had a round that asked questions related to the BHG's biggest hit, The Bad Touch. Personally, I prefer their song "you're pretty when I'm drunk." Like I said, classing up the joint.

Then we had a round that tested the limits of your knowledge on the "hits" of DJ Sammy. To be honest, I like some of these versions better. When I hear the DJ Sammy version of Heaven come on the radio I just want to tell him "Baby, you're all that I want, when I'm lying here in your arms." But then I remember that I'm listening to a radio, and most radios don't have arms, so I stop thinking that.

Sooner or Later round for all you auto-mechanics and car dealers! Unfortunately for me, my knowledge of cars is pretty much limited to the 1985 Delorean's power capacity, so I would have been SOL here. That said, you guys did a lot better than me. This was the highest scoring round of the night!

Let's talk about punk'd for a second. Honestly, who told them that the ill-advised apostrophe in that title was a good idea? All it does is make me want to punch Ashton Kutcher in the D'ick. Also, I don't have MTV, but I am disgusted to know that they are trying to revamp Punk'd with the help of an asshole like Justin Bieber. You know who the joke is actually on? Those mother fuckers that gave him the money to be relevant (also known as all of us.)

Our visual round was good for people who enjoy the works of the world's greatest detective (other than Batman.) I certainly hope everyone has seen the BBC show Sherlock. It is so goddamn good. Significantly better than the Downey movies (and I actually like those.) I think it's funny that CBS hopped on that train and has succeeded due mostly to the BBC's limited runs on shows. Seriously, Elementary is to Sherlock what methadone is to Heroin. Not the best, but a way to tide you over when you run out of the good shit.

Round six was all about foiling things, yet there was no question about Scooby Doo. What the crap? I had planned on asking a question about t anyway, but I was running short on time. DAG NABBIT! I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for you meddling kids.

Rough quiz tonight guys, the quiz gods were not kind to your scores. Nonetheless, a fun time was had by all. Next week, we'll get you all something to put a little pep in your step. See you then!

The Bulldog Uptown
2549 Lyndale Ave S.
Minneapolis, MN 55405
Mondays: 8:00 PM
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7:34 AM, June 04, 2013


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Scores

Shitty Beetles	73

My couch pulls out... but I don't	71

Twisted Fister	69

It's a nice day for a Red Wedding	67

GWD? I thought you said Sphincter leak	66

Good Question	65

Dinosaurs!	63

Beered Gamers	62

The Bad Idea Committee	61

Clam Slams	57

The Anti-Dentites	54

Jauquin Penis	54

St. United	53

Maroon 4	53

Smarty Pints	51

Spaceman Spiff	46

Airwolf	45

Lone Stars	10

Where did Alf go anyway?

Nick

Do you guys remember ALF? He's back, and in pog form! Ok, so maybe we didn't really talk about pogs tonight, but everyone's favorite cat eating alien did make an appearance. I'm glad we give that cute little bufanted mutant some love. I'm also pretty glad we gave a little love to Northern Exposure, maybe the most underrated sitcom of the 90s. Rob Morrow was just a little bit too early to catch the run-off neurotic jew love from the success of Seinfeld. Rough biz.

I was a big fan of our first musical round, The Sound of Color. Unfortunately, there was no Pocahantas in this round. Instead we stayed in our non-Disney wheelhouse, throwing up some Bobby Brown, some Johnny Cash, and some 311. I love that 311 song so much. In fact, when i play racquetball, I always try really hard to get the score to 3-11, just so that I can sing "whhhAAAAAAoooooooo." True (if boring) story.

Then we had our round on cinema jail bait. One notable omission from this list: the dude that played McLovin. Apparently, at the time of Superbad, he was only 17, while that girl with the white pants was 20, so they had to abide by some super strict laws during filming the sex scene to avoid any child pornography laws. True (and super interesting) story.

Round 4 featured a bunch of questions about bovines. I'll be honest, I have no idea why cattle pancreas are called Sweetbread. Maybe it has something to do with all those psychoactive mushrooms growing from piles of bullshit. Goddamn hippies will do anything to make their whacky ass hobbies seem more normal.

I'll be honest, round five would have stumped me something fierce. I subscribe to both GQ and Esquire (you know, because I'm a man of the world) but they never told me anything about most of these fashion accessories. Ok, I knew about Fezs and I probably would have guess that the Irish/Scottish looking one was the Tam O'Shanter, but after that, I would have been down for the count.

A round all about bridges and no appearances by the fucking Dude himself? That is bordering on loco, hombre. Still we had questions about NBA jam, so everyone got their 90's fix in. "Can't BUY a bucket." Now there is a phrase that haunted my 9 year old self.

In our round about the famous last lines in movies, I almost gave Clam Slams negative points for thinking that the last lines of Army of Darkness were Back to the future. Everyone knows the famous last line from BTTF is "roads? where we're going we don't need roads." So nuts to you.

In any case, still a good quiz, and an awesome turnout. we'll see you all next week!

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