I'm all for erotica. I'm all for people exploring themselves and becoming sexual aware.

However, the idea that fucking 50 Shades of Grey xould be someone's introduction to said lifestyle change is baffling. 

The book is like a ratty, cumstained sweater, the threads held together with the vestiges of infantile lust and elementry school sentence structure. Mr. Grey in the novel is about as Peter Fucking Pan as you can get with a protagonist. If you honestly, honestly care about such things, just read Screw The Roses, Send The Thorns. Once you have some of the mechanics and ideas down, I promise you, you can write something better than 50 Shades in the bathroom stall of a truck stop ran by tranvestite AIDs monkeys.

Congratulations to F-ING MASSHOLES for 1st place. See you next week!