Sorry, little Hemsworth, you're just not on America's radar yet. Try playing a superhero in multiple blockbuster films, or maybe dating a Cyrus. Be careful if you go with Billy Ray, though, because he's got an achey-breaky heart.

What a night, Dubliners! You guys are real good at what you do: drinking, laughing, writing sh*t down, etc. If there were a Quizlympics, I'd want you all on my team. Well, okay, maybe like five of you. But I'd definitely want the rest of you cheering us on from the sidelines! It'd be nice if you got us some Gatorade once in a while, too.

I'm glad that we had that round on weird holidays. Now I won't feel so crazy the next time I burn my straw bear costume. Everybody's doing it! Don't believe me? Ask winners Reese Witherbooze, who seem to know just about everything. Congrats, champs!

Scorpions played pretty well and may have placed if they didn't have a shit ton of people on their team. I will never know popularity like that. Congratulations on your well-maintained relationships! Enjoy being well-adjusted. I'm gonna go sit in a corner and read graphic novels.

See you next week!
Quizmaster Brittany

Sometimes I read the news online (CN- something or another), but it's always tough to decipher what's real from what's fake. I mean, I guess it's all real, but it just doesn't feel like it should be called "news". Example: Obama's verbal slip when he called Kamala Harris the most beautiful Attorney General around. The corresponding article was oddly slanted, and even ended with "What do you think? Sound off in the comments below".

Uh, we're not journalists. We shouldn't be "sounding off" on news articles. Or, if that's the way it has to be, can't we put the comments on separate pages or something? I hate the fact that there are children somewhere reading news stories and then scrolling down and absorbing all of the anonymous hate being spewed in a public forum falsely identified as factual.

My point, here, is that Justin Bieber is kind of a douche.

Our top three teams were within one point of each other. Damn! Congratulations, geniuses, and a special shootout to Shooting for 4th, who placed -- you guessed it -- in 4th.

See y'all next Wednesday!
-QM Brittany

Your upstage/downstage flub cost your team the game, Izzy! Actually, that was just one point out of many that could have helped your team out; I wouldn't worry too much if I were you.

David Keen and Wayne LaPierre: two brahs I don't want to meet in a dark alley. Why? Because they'd probably shoot me and claim self-defense, and they'd have an entire organization of furthest-away-right-wing nutjobs behind them firing rounds of support. People with guns are scary; hicks with guns are terrifying.

That's right, I'm calling everyone in the NRA a hick. Deal with it.

I've never seen anyone rock a Yodeling Tie-Breaker like you, The Dubliner. I felt like I was at the Live 8 concert! Congratulations, My Turnips! You really did your facial hair proud.

Margaret's Thatchers: You guys are great! You don't miss a lot of questions, but when you do it's sure to catch my eye (example: "Penis face?"). Way to lead, you filthy champs, you! See y'all next Wednesday!

-QM Brittany

p.s. 'Like' your face on my book!

• The Royal Hilltop - Aurora 8:00 PM
• Darcy's Bistro & Pub - Denver 8:30 PM
• Prickly Pete's - Denver 8:00 PM
• The Whiskey Bar - Denver 7:00 PM
• The Cheeky Monk - Westminster 9:00 PM
• The Ram (Meridian) - Meridian 9:00 PM
• Lisa's Restaurant & Lounge - Augusta 7:30 PM
• Opal Divine's (Marina) - Austin 10:00 PM
• Opal Divine's (Penn Field) - Austin 10:00 PM