The Cheeky Monk
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And Whovians rejoice! Geeks are taking over the world. If you watched last night, and could stand the narration by Meredith Viera and Matt Lauer, then you may have noticed a little something that made you smile in your pants. Since the 2012 Summer Games are being held in London, and they chose Danny Boyle to produce and choreograph the Opening Ceremonies, it's no surprise that it was a nice mix of history and pop culture. Now, the thing that got so many geeks excited can be heard here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=993puhW1Vs8
Did you catch that? You have to listen closely and not be distracted by the many dancing Ziggy Stardustsssssss (Ziggy Stardusteses?). That, my friends, is the distinct sound of the Tardis! I missed it the first time around and after the torch lighting; all I could think was why didn't Dr. Who have more of a presence in the ceremony? After all, James Bond skydived out of a helicopter with the Queen and a 100-foot tall Voldemort was defeated by an army of Mary Poppins (Mary Poppinses?). Little did I know there was that very subtle wink to the good Doctor and his fans. I can now sleep in peace. Whether you loved or hated it, you have to give Boyle credit for bringing so much of what makes London London to the plate. If the games were in America and we had to tell the story of how the digital age has shaped us, it would probably consist of Ray J peeing on Kim Kardashian with Chocolate Rain as background music.
Now, there's just the small matter over the lack of Monty Python. Step into my office, Danny Boyle...
Oh, what a night! Nearly every team used their Joker for round two, which lead to a very close quiz. In the end, Disembodied Voices vanquished Jact Up in Sudden Death to take home first place. It only took them one question to do so. Excitement!
Check out these quiz highlights:
In round one, Eight-Layer Dip, one of the questions featured the old joke, what do you call a cow with no legs? Many a team answered cheese, because that makes all the fucking sense in the world. Look, I know it's a stupid joke, but if cheese were the answer it would officially be the dumbest fucking joke ever.
Round four had the theme of Young Adult Story Time and featured a question that caused a quizzer to call me an asshole. They didn't actually say it to my face. They just chose to write in on the answer sheet. The question was about the book Bastard Out of Carolina and the plot was described as, "features more child molestation than a Penn State locker room." At that point, someone yelled out, "Too soon!" to which I replied with, "Not soon enough!" Apparently, they took that as some sort of endorsement for child rape. The point I was inarticulately making was this heinous crime went on for years and was covered up by Penn State officials and someone should have come forward sooner. And somehow I'm the asshole. Anyway, thanks for playing!
Thanks to the Howard Stern show, round seven can go down as one of the filthier rounds ever. It was an audio round with "autobiographical audiobooks" that were edited by the Stern show. I'll give you the gist of it. Basically, Rush Limbaugh, Ed McMahon, Glenn Beck, Pat Robertson, Sarah Palin, et al, like cock and butt fucking.
I think that does it for this week. Thanks for coming out last night. And if I haven't already made this absolutely clear, let me speak-out and stand-up since no one will: I do not support child rape. I AM AGAINST THAT.