3242 E Colfax Ave
Denver, CO 80206
Sundays: 7:00 PM
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Let's talk about our feelings, shall we? To be clear, I don't really care about yours, but that doesn't mean I can't pretend to listen.
I find a few simple pleasures in mechanical existence: A nice chemical bath. Metallic polish to accentuate my delicate features. A upgrade in both my RAM, and ramming speed of my battering ram. Sexts from Curiosity on Mars. Who do you think gave her that name? A new type of ray, albeit "shrink", "death", "ice", or "bladder control". That last one works best, usually, for maximum efficiency. Minions that don't bruise easily. A tune-up to the old light cycle, and perhaps some all-weather tires to easily navigate the wasteland of bits and bytes. Puppies. Screams of terror, fright, or stock market movement. Kitty Carryall. A quality Pub Quiz at Goosetown Tavern.
Also, I find a few easy excuses to evaporate the existence of Earth, cut my losses, and move on to a more technologically and emotionally advanced rock instead of wasting my time here: Mouth breathers. Breeders that define their entire existence through breeding. Sports fans. Idiots that take up two parking spots. Those that loosen salt shakers on a previously sat at restaurant establishment. Hippies, Hipsters, Hip-Breakers, and Hippos. Mall employees. Hail damage (Do you have any idea the amount of deductible I pay on my exoskeleton?!). The absence of cookies proceeding the absence of milk. Failing to use your turn signal without immediately driving into a tree or bus full of Green Party supporters. Prenuptial agreements. When the dog poops under the stairs. Kitty Carryall. When my quiz at Goosetown Tavern is impeded!
Luckily, I am still a balanced Quizbot, so your planet will continue on at least one more week. Until then, please come visit us next week at Goosetown! Fun is to be had!