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McCabe's Bistro & Pub
6100 S Main St
Aurora, CO 80014
Wednesdays: 8:00 PM
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1:26 PM, August 02, 2012
Scores
Trojan Wokforce 78
Getting Real Tired of Your Shit China 71
Would Chick Fil A Sponsor Mens Synchronized Diving 69
Literally Illiterate 59
It Was Good Idea Yesterday 54
Beef Tits 53
Reunited And It Feels SO Good 53
Matsercard Limits 48
Everything Evil 44
I Suddenly want To Go Swimming
Look At This F**king Quizmaster


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Quiz Schedule
Mondays at Ernie's, Wednesdays at the Denver Wrangler, Saturdays at Prickly Pete's, and Sundays at Brendan's 404. 		John LaHendro (Look At This F**king Quizmaster)

Johnny was raised in the Swiss Alps by his grandfather and often has trouble differentiating his life from the movie Heidi.  He has a completely worthless degree in Creative Writing from the University Of Colorado, which he has parlayed into never getting a real job.  When he's not quizzing, he can be found drinking good scotch and cheap beer and bitching about how Charles Bukowski has completely ruined his life.  John is currently living in a remote area of south Denver, which he knows for a fact to be Denver due to the large number of DPD officers he sees hanging around his apartment complex.  His hobbies include watching old episodes of Mystery Science Theatre, playing classic Nintendo games, and making fun of your favorite band.  He also sometimes confuses his life with that of Batman and is currently trying to track down the Joker and bring him to justice.

I know a seemed a little distracted last night, but you would be too if during a question about which president swam naked in the Potomac, an attractive young lady yelled, “me!”  I mean, come on people, we need to get our priorities straight here.  What’s more important, U.S. Presidents or beautiful young women frolicking in the river?  I think I just answered my own question.

Bagpipes, is there anything they can’t ruin.  No, there is not.  Bagpipes are definitely proof that Hell is real and that we are all going there when we die. We don’t really have a say in this matter.  And we will hear the sound of ACDC’s Thunderstruck being played on the pipes for the rest of eternity.  Lucky for me, I still don’t believe in hell, because otherwise, I’d probably be cramming my face with chicken sandwiches and nodding in fervent agreement with Sarah Palin.  And if I ever do end up doing that, I have completely lost all mental capacities and should probably be placed in a home.  And I know that we are on the verge of beating the whole Chick-Fil-A thing to death, but seriously, fuck those guys.

Fun fact!  The words “President Bush” and “badass” have never been used in the same sentence.  And attempts to do so in the past have resulted in the speaker breaking into hysterical laughter at the sheer absurdity of it,  Conversely, having the name Roosevelt automatically makes you a level 50 badass.  Just ask Eleanor.

Well, that’s going to wrap things up.  But before I go, I want to remind you that the King of Comedy is one of the most underrated films of all time and you should watch it as soon as possible.  But don’t kidnap Jerry Lewis.  That rarely goes well.