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The Canterbury Ale House
534 15th Ave E
Seattle, WA
98112
[Wednesday 7:00 pm]
Wednesday, Jan 11, 2017

Scores

What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
75
Miniature Equine Afficianados
73
Dr. Jill
72
Commercial Broaster
71
Sex Dossier
69
Rex Goliath and the Franzias
69
Urine Trouble
68
Touched by an uncle
67
Genocide-kwa
65
Bitch I might Bee
64
Drawing a Blank
60
Trump's lovely lady parts
59
med quiz
58
The New Best Friends
58
IDK
56
Serenity Now!
56
The Spinsters and chef boy-are-dan
56
Red Shirts
55
Mike Hunt
54
Nana nana nana nana Batman!
54
Our smartest member has four legs
53
The Curmudgeon
53
Wolverines
49
First Intuition
43
Have you seen Mike Hunt?
42
10 min late
41
Rekt Butts
40
Fuck you guys
30
Birthday Girl
4
Quiz Venue Logo

You Suck, Portland

Cap'n Brendan

Seriously, Portland sucks. Speaking as a life-long Seattle resident with all the big-brother complex that comes along with that, I’m comfortable saying this. What with all its traffic and rivers and highway signs that you can’t even see until you’re past the exit; its hipsters in all their bearded, skinny-jeaned glory; the idea that the only good brunch is one you wait in line for 90 minutes to eat; and that general “Keep Portland Weird” attitude that the locals embrace like it’s a dying relative. And don’t even get me started on the weird-ass local liquor laws. Fucking Portlandia.

It’s not fair that a city this obnoxious gets to have so much cool stuff. The aforementioned restaurants that may actually be worth waiting in line for. A transit system that rivals the one ST3 wants to build, without the $50 Billion price tag. Something resembling affordable housing – at least compared to what passes for it in Seattle. Ground Kontrol. The Acropolis. Some of my absolute favorite-est people in the world. A homeless population that’s so well-cared for, they rarely aggressively panhandle – again, probably for less than the $1,700/person/month we spent to create homeless RV lots nobody wanted in the first place. Food trucks. Craft beer. No sales tax. And now an honest-to-goodness blizzard. IT’S NOT FAIR.

I’ve traveled the U.S., nay the world, and I’ve never visited a city that I could spend a week in and come away thinking “I should move here, this is so much better for me than Seattle.” Portland MIGHT be the only one that could claim that mantle, if it weren’t for all the reasons I refuse to like it. But seriously, dat snow though. #want

Enough about Portland. Maybe if we stop talking about it, it’ll go away. Here’s a look at how you did on tonight’s quiz!

Round #

Theme

Avg Score

High Score

1

Duh

5.14/8

8 (What’s the Difference Between a Chickpea and a Garbanzo Bean?)

2

What Do You Not Get About ANONYMOUS? (music)

10.11/16

15 (Dr. Jill)

3

I Lava Good List

4.63/8

6 (4 teams)

4

A Bug’s Life

4.32/8

8 (Miniature Equine Aficionados)

5

Eraserhead (visual)

5.89/8

8 (4 teams)

6

Take it Down the Runway

5.32/8

7 (3 teams)

7

Sitting Through the Credits Is Its Own Reward (audio)

4.88/8

7 (2 teams)

8

Random Knowledge

9.19/16

13 (Urine Trouble)

Congratulations to What’s the Difference Between a Chickpea and a Garbanzo Bean?, who took home the gold(en shower) tonight and $50 for first place. Second and $20 fell to Lil’ Sebastian fans Miniature Equine Aficionados, and the $10 for next-to-last wound up in the hands of 10 Min. Late. I hate rewarding tardiness, but in this case it’s really on Rekt Butts for letting you pass them after missing the first round. We had some great team names tonight, but one I liked that didn’t bring home any other prize was Nana nana nana nana BATMAN! – because seriously, how fun to say is that?

It was a pleasure spending my Wednesday with you – as always. Take care of yourselves, FUCK PORTLAND, and I’ll see you next week!

Help DJ future quizzes! Here’s a link to our collaborative playlist on Spotify. Subscribe, add music you want to hear next time, and delete things you don’t. It’s one big social experiment!

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