A good quiz tonight, Geek Bowl hangovers and post-competition malaise notwithstanding. Sure, we didn't see a few Geek Bowl teams, as I'd expected, but our enthusiastic newbies, and McCabes' to-be QM Drew, whom I trained tonight, more than made up for it. We had, for instance, a team of Army Band members who, other than shouting a lot, seem like regulars in the making. Likewise with the group who argued with me whether Tool sucked and then had roughly 47 members.

Anyway, good times were had. Let's look at some pictures together, you and I:

Scores!

3+1=5                              79
The Last Gasp of Buddy Glass       71
Doh!                               70
Define Statutory                   61
Puxatawny Hamburgers               56
Bingo the Wonder Pony              50
Loraxes                            47
Totes McGoats                      44
Quiz in My Pants                   37
Caucaphase                         32
HIV and the Positives              31
Empire Strikes Back                29

A good n' raucous quiz tonight, with plenty of newbies, some Geek Bowl contenders, many accusations of cheating, another offer of boobs and an upsy-downsy leaderboard throughout the night. A big crowd equals fun no matter how much shouting I have to put up with, most times, and tonight was no exception. My only regret is that 1) I busted out the camera a little too late, missing a few teams who, not so much with the winning, packed it in early; and 2) There was no tie to justify a dance-off, since tonight sorta felt like a dance-off kind of night. That said, here're pics:

It was a weird quiz, score-wise, what with newbies Ketchup for Your Wizard Sleeve, Stephen Hawking's Running Shoes and Barack Obama's Big Donkey Caucus taking an early lead. Some of them held it, despite my suspicions of PDA cheating, and then the ol' standbys came through: 3+1=5 and Golden Girls Gone Wild and Nerd Force Jihad claimed it in the end, the latter ruling the roost by a lot and scoring super-awesomely on a very hard quiz. All of them are a force to be reckoned with come Saturday.

Nerd Force Jihad                                  82
3+1=5                                             72
Golden Girls Gone Wild                            63
Sorry Tyler, Your Sister is a Dick Connoisseur    61
Tullamore Doomed                                  56
The Team Formerly Known As Prince                 56
Immortal Flamers                                  56
Obama's Big Donkey Caucus                         56
Stephen Hawking's Running Shoes                   54
Ultraviolet Gravy                                 51
Loraxes                                           50
Ketchup For Your Wizard Sleeve                    47
Totes McGoats                                     46
Empire Strikes Back                               25
Don't Shout Out                                   23
JB Me                                             13

For the record, it's unfair to name your team after either A) Showing the quizmaster boobs; or B) Invoking a powerful and shared male fantasy. The team calling themselves If Princess Leia Shows You Her Boobs/Fun-Bags/Ta-Tas/Tits, Can We Win For Once did both. Once upon a time, you see, a hot girl showed up in a Princess Leia costume, and tonight she used that against me. This was unfair. But lo! I was strong. So strong, diary. Let's move on.

A good n' full room tonight, with lots of wonderful regulars and many equally wonderful newbies drawn to the quiz by my newfound fame. Everyone was awesome and we high-fived. Spiritually, I mean. Let's look at some pictures:

All very nice-looking, pleasant and attractive people, yes? I think so. It was an alternately difficult and easy quiz tonight; the tough rounds made up for the ones in which everybody averaged 7 or 8 points. I like that. Makes me say mrow. Like this: "Mrow." See?

Well, 3+1=5 did very well tonight, rocking a tough quiz with aplomb. For Whom The Taco Bell Tolls were right behind them, despite having tied the early-jokering and cheat-tempting aforementioned Leia boob team for most of the night. And Hamburger With A Side of Jihad slithered into third.

3+1=5                                     77
For Whom The Taco Bell Tolls              70
Hamburger With a Side of Jihad            69
Stupid Mother Trucker                     61
If Princess Leia Shows You Her Tits,
Can We Win For Once?                      56
Ultimate                                  54
Totes McGoats                             53
Brainiac 5                                53
Spank My Little Pony                      51
Veronicas                                 50
Loraxes                                   48
Bingo the Wonder Pony                     47
Taco Sundae                               41
Hosteen                                   29
I'm a Wanker                              23
Standard Deviants                         11

Despite my newfound fame the crowd was one that I knew and loved and we all gathered together for group hugs and stuff. And high fives! Oh, how we high fived!

Golden Girls Gone Wild had it pretty much sewn up from round two. Try as they might, them other teams just couldn't catch up. But it was funny to watch them try.

Golden Girls Gone Wild                     76
3+1=5                                      70
Define Statutory                           67
Conan O'Cryin'                             56
Veronicas                                  47
Hamburger with a Side                      47
Are You Ready to Rock Haiti?               39
Hi in the Middle                           37
Blagojevich                                36
Multiple Scoregasm                         17

Despite the stupid-ass subzero tardation, a nice and well-attended quiz tonight in the warm little enclave of dork that was McCabes. Plenty of regulars and a good sampling of newbies, and it was nice to see one of my old teams from Quinn's, Hurricane Ditka, make an appearance.

So here are some pictures. Warning: drinks were drunk and dance-off occurred, and there are private parts ahead. Enjoy:

[TESTICLE PHOTO REMOVED BECAUSE OF GWD PURITAN SENSIBILITIES. I MEAN, IT'S JUST LIKE, OUR BODIES, MAN. WHAT ISN'T BEAUTIFUL ABOUT OUR BODIES? HOW CAN SOMETHING THAT IS A PART OF US BE CONSIDERED OFFENSIVE? ANYWAY, THINK ABOUT IT. SEE YOU AT BURNING MAN.]

It was, boobs and balls aside, an upset game tonight, with 3+1=5 just barely snatching victory from the leaders. Golden Girls Gone Wild and We're Not Running For Reelection II duked it out for second, first by dance-off and then by impromptu haiku contest.

3+1=5                                  75
Golden Girls Gone Wild                 74 (overtime!)
We're Not Running For Reelection       74
Wonder Jihad                           69
Brainiac 5                             65
Rush Has A Heart?                      63
Team Townie (719 In Yo Face!)          61
Freezin' Demon Fetal Harvest           58
Oh, Hamburgers                         58
Hurricane Ditka                        56
Who Do You Have To Blow To
Get A Beer In This Place?              49
Pro-Tractors                           39

So I show up last night, all responsible, having actually remembered to bring my camera, having remembered to charge it and left plenty of memory. I took pictures of all the teams and felt very pleased with myself. It was swell. And then iPhoto freezes and I force-quit and I lose all of those wonderful well-composed, lovingly taken portraits and I throw my computer off a cliff and it bursts into flames and Skeletor laughs his evil laugh.

What do I do then? I randomly select five photos from quizzes past and put them up so Dicker doesn't flay the meat from my bones. He's a cruel overlord, he is. Enjoy this trip down memory lane and please do revel in these photos of people you neither know nor care about:

And, for good measure, here is a photo of Mike Jones, the man who got famous by outing Ted Haggard, and my dog looking at a chainsaw bust of Hitler. Try to guess which is which:

It was a pretty well-attended one last night, and Mr. Flintstone Cuz I Make Your Bedrock, perennial attendees, had it sewn up from round two. They also gave me instructions on how to smoke weed with Michael Phelps. We then high-fived.

Les scores!

Mr. Flintstone Cuz I Make Your Bedrock                          71
Golden Girls Gone Wild                                          69
3+1=5                                                           67
Define Statutory                                                62
Fruit of the Boom                                               61
Is That A Bomb In Your Pants Or Are You Just Happy to See Me?   55
Preschool Rulz                                                  52
Multiple Scoregasm                                              48
Do You Want to Experience the Explosion in My Pants?            48
12 Inches of Dangling Fury                                      48
The Smegheads                                                   43
Oh, Hamburgers                                                  42
Beer Crackers                                                   33

Wednesday was not only Christmas Eve EVE, but it also happened to be the night of the big quiz at Mccabe's in the Springs. With regular quizmaster Aaron "someday I will be batman" Retka off having holiday related fun (or perhaps just hiding out from the cops), I stepped in to broker the quiz for the teeming masses that braved the somewhat cold temperatures, reasonably stiff breeze and (worst of all) lousy drivers to enjoy hot quiz action.

Aaron's shame-o-meter (the shot counter) was in effect...I can't say FULL effect since I was only treated to one shot from the crowd BUT...It happened to be the one shot that I could make about 10 easy hack jokes about...Observe the noble "blowjob"

So yeah, I was given a blowjob at McCabe's, although it had to go in my mouth. Thank God it at least came from a chick...Boy, that would've been weird if it came from a dude...Anyway...

That was the only picture that my camera would take on Wednesday, apparently. I handed it over to the 2nd place team and, when they handed it back...nothing. AS SUCH: here are a couple of crappy camera phone pics for your ocular amusement...

This is not only the team that I will contend killed my camera, but also took second place. it's 3+1=5, who hung around near the top all night...Fine work, kids!

and here's the Grinches, the 3rd place team and also, the guy there was the email winner. And somewhere in the bar was the 1st place team Taints for Tots who rocked all night, pretty much dominating. Pretty much.

To prove it, here are the numbers:
The Scores:

Taints for Tots           78
3+1=5                     69
Grinches                  62
Multiple Scoregasms       59
Bingo The Wonder Pony     59
Game On                   58
Spank My Little Pony :)   52
Battle Buddies            51
Trae's A Real Boy Now!    38
Woofer                    36
Wildcatz                  33

An uber-regulars-ish sort of quiz last night, which is always like crawling into a cozy nerd-womb: they know me, I know them, and then we get on the merry-go-round of whirling knives. We had a few teams teams, sure, and even they were impressed by the love-in that took place. It was like if Teen Wolf went to the prom with a chick who was really into furries. Give 'er the business, Teen Wolf!

We had the first of auditions last night for my replacement. Drew, a longtime nerd, builder of the Shot Counter and all-around master of swellness, got on the mic to illustrate how a room full of people can be dicks to someone they sense is nervous. They're predators, the crowd is, and a formerly warm and fuzzy room turns vicious in an instant. Dicks.

I could've have played that Sleighbells round all fucking night, just to let you know. And it really, really bothers me that there's a Spice Girls Christmas album out there that I don't have. Unfair is what it is.

So, some dark and blurry iPhone pictures? Don't mind if I do:

So, the game? Yeah, Golden Girls Gone Wild had that shit sewn up in an instant last night, and I expect some awesomeness from them Geek Bowl this year, as well from the other 3 or 4 McCabes teams who'll be showing up to mop the floor with the new competition. Texas? Really? We're supposed to be scared of Texas? Like, intellectually and not because of guns? Bah.

Scores:

Golden Girls Gone Wild                             69
Nerd Force 20/20                                   58
Brainiac 5                                         57
3+1=5                                              55
Define Statutory                                   51
Scrotum: It Looks Like Chicken Fate                50
42 Is the Answer                                   45
Spank My Little Pony                               37
Stupid Is As Stupid Does                           37
Tiger Woods: 18 Holes and Counting                 32
Unmerciless                                        24

I know I'm nerd. I've known this for some time. But I got to prove it tonight by not only playing a clip from the new Star Trek, to prove a point, but by sticking around afterwards for Wrath of Khan and then arguing about antimatter. Wouldn't it make more sense if the large forepiece on the Enterprise was a Bussard Ramjet, and that the particles it collected exploded against the antimatter canisters, much in the same way that a conventional internal combustion engine does? But for free? No? I'm a dork for suggesting such a thing? Okay.

So given the ridiculous, ridiculous weather, a not-bad turnout, with some energetic new teams and a whole lotta regulars. Among the newbies were a team calling themselves German Chicks who were genuinely German, and who were unamused by me commenting on the freakiness of my German ex, and by extension, them.

What's that? You say you're glad my real camera died? That I had to take pictures with my iPhone? That you love blurry, incredibly dark pictures in which you can hardly tell who you're looking at? Man, have I got the thing for you:

3+1=5                             71
Bingo the Wonder Pony             68
Tastes Like Chicken               66
Freaky Tongued Parasites          63
Loraxes                           55
Define Statutory                  55
Five Iron Beatdown                55
Spank My Little Pony              50
Stupid is As Stupid Does          49
TNT                               46
The Next Generation               26
Team Whoops                       25
German Chicks                     23