That's it, folks at Casey's. Not only does Ken get delicious vegan cupcakes from you, but he also gets cigarettes? I step outside "for a moment," to enjoy American Tobacco's finest, I come back to the quiz table, and there are 2 packs of cigarettes sitting on my computer. I make the announcement that I'm substiken for the night, and someone comes up, says, "Oh, these were for Ken," and takes them away to my cries of "I can be bought too! I can be bought too!" The cries fell on deaf ears as he walked away to bribe Ken another day.

I don't think I could pay for better entertainment than my semi-frequent visits to you all. Nothing beats watching Tara get down to the self-penned stylings of Hanson, hearing you quizlings applaud each other for standings, and of course the general vibe of the bar.

Here's what I'm thinking right now:

-Round 6. Oh round 6. We argued about how a tongue is not a face or head, and I told you about the drive through robbery of an adult store in Ohio. Watch it for yourself

-We all apparently wouldn't mind seeing James Cromwell in just about anything.

-The Star Spangled Banner's tune was a drinking song. Don't know about you, but I've never been drunk enough to hit those high bits. Maybe Jay Cutler can?

-I don't think your newspaper gets to count as the "most popular" in the world if you sell it to hotels as their default by your door paper. Although it is telling that we went from the Wall Street Journal to OMG WTF news by USA Today as a bestseller.

-My favourite quizling moment of the night? When Dashboard Jesus went to his new owner, he busts out singing "Jesus Take the Wheel" to his little bobble-headed figurine. Classy.

And here's something I hope you'll really like:

Quizlings pay good attention, I was actually *thanked* by this fine gentleman with a handshake before he left for the night: perhaps chivalry is not dead. Or maybe he just wants to see if a penis sleeve really does live up to its reputation: you decide!

They came from as far away....as the back corner booth!

Team BSU-Australia swears their brother just handed them those performance enhancing drugs! Rather than be shamed out of pub quiz, they gracefully bowed out at the top of their career.

Maybe because she'll always be third place to Mariah and Madonna, that might be why Whitney Houston Still Blows, thanks for being kind to my friends, and may next week bring greater heights!

So when I comment they got a "perfect score," team members comment back to me, "We always seem to get 69." Hey, you're allowed to be cocksure when you're Wolfman: A Perfect Blend of Wolf and Man

As Beck would say, "I think I'm in love, but it makes me kinda' nervous to say so." Thanks for the correctly placed apostrophes and congratulations to First Place It's Not Love, It's Chlamydia

Scores:

It's Not Love, It's Chlamydia              70**
Wolfman: A Perfect Blend of Wolf and Man   69*
Whitney Houston Still Blows                67
Team Venture                               63
Drawing a Blank                            63
Smokey the Bear Must be on Vacation        59
Left Hemiporesis                           59
Screw Me on the Dance Floor                57
SOTA                                       36
BSU-Australia                              27
NOLA                                       24

*Perfect! Well, if you think Bill and Ted are perfect...
**Perfect with extra credit!