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Brewmasters Bar & Grill
301 W Martin St
Raleigh, NC 27601
Thursdays: 7:00 PM
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10:00 PM, April 17, 2014
Scores
The WAG of the Manatee 65

Rhubaaaarb! 58

The Artist Formerly Known as â??Lick UR Boom Boom Downâ?쳌 57

Killer Tofu 57

Minnesota Nice 56

My Moustache is Better Than Your Moustache 46

Off a Lot 23

Fancy Pants Security 22

Bunghole Surfer 8

RP4 3

Ho-Ho the Wonderdog!


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Quiz Schedule
Brewmasters Bar & Grill, Thursdays at 7pm
Hobert (Ho-Ho the Wonderdog!)

Hello, All!

My name is Hobert, and I'm your Quizmaster for Geeks Who Drink at Brewmasters Bar & Grill.

Here are some fun stats about me, ripped straight from my rookie trading card:

Name: Hobert Thompson

Height: a mean 6ft

Weight: a mean 200lbs

Shoe size: an average 10 1/2

Skills: Reading questions out loud, improv comedy-ing, film making, outdoorsmanship, horse wrangling, and listing.

Fun Fact: had his life long fear of snakes proved right after a snake bit his face.

Good Morning Quiz-fans! Tonight’s quiz featured a round on rabbits, our favorite vermin! Yes, man has always had a rocky relationship with the branch of mammalia that decided (yes, I believe evolution is a choice) to get small and crushable, yet still want to sneak into our homes and yards to dig or scurry or whatever. In case you were wondering, I’ve been working on a tiered system for classifying small mammals not based on their physical characteristics, but their ability to creep us out. Let’s look at the chart!

Tier 1 - Rats - No one likes rats, man. We are conditioned to hate them because they carry disease and bite our children and drag their balls as they walk while peeing for some reason that is gross. If you see a rat in your house, most people would freak out.

Tier 2 - Mice - A cartoon mouse? Universally beloved. A mouse in your house? Not nearly as fun as the rhyme would suggest.

Tier 3 - Squirrels and Rabbits - Cute and cuddly, but forbidden in the home! However, if they did manage to sneak in, you’d be as tempted to serve them a salad and see if they will submit to wear a tiny hat at you’d be to kill them with a blunt object.

Tier 3 1/2 - Foreign vermin - Depending on where you are, certain mammals can jump tiers, so I made them their own tier. If a kangaroo is rummaging around your garden in Australia, you’d be annoyed and go fetch a knife slingshot (which is what I imagine Australians use to protect their homes). If a kangaroo hopped into your yard in NC, you’d probably try to take its picture, or sit in its pouch. Other animals in this tier: armadillos, pandas, small monkeys, chinchillas, mogwais, etc.

Tier 4 - Dogs and Cats - When they’re our pets, the worst you’d do is yell and get mad if they pee on the couch. If a stray dog or cat came into your home and peed on your couch, you’d call animal control on them. I don’t know why, but this seems simultaneously less cruel and more cruel than the way we deal with mice and rats. When you’re an animal, it sucks to be poisoned, but it’s got to be really weird to be arrested by animal cops and sent to animal jail.

Tier 5 - Larger, edible mammals - Most people would do nothing if a deer or a buffalo started grazing in their yard, assuming this was something out of their control. Some people, though, would shoot these animals and eat their parts.

You don’t see people doing that with rats…and that’s why the tier system exists. Use it well, folks. Print this blog post out, and tape it to your fridge so you can consult it when a rabbit bounces into your yard. Pro-tip: always have a drawer of tiny hats in your home, just for those occasions when you need to dress up small animals.

Tonight’s Quiz

We had a grand time at Brewmasters Bar and Grill last night! Ten teams faced off on the quiz field of quiz battle quizzing their little hearts out. The Artist Formerly Known as “Lick UR Boom Boom Down” (represented by a symbol they drew that looked sort of looked like a stop sign getting it on with a mushroom) started out strong in the early rounds, and seemed like they were unstoppable, but the power of birthday magic, a mystical totem, and Lick UR Boom Boom Down’s lack of rabbit knowledge helped Rhubaaaarb! and The WAG of the Manatee power to the top! Happy Birthday, Rhubaaaarb! and I’m glad your email bonus prize was magic, The WAG of the Manatee!

Or was it magic? Maybe it just gave you the confidence to quiz from the heart. (No, it was magic).

Notes From Tonight’s Quiz

Tonight I revealed my weird condition to the crowd, and though I thought I was being brave by showing people who I really am, I was disappointed with boos and jeers. Hello, my name is Hobert, and l can’t tell the difference between Susan Sarandon and Sigourney Weaver. I don’t know why I’m like this, but I just can’t remember that they are two different people. I seriously had to look their filmographies as I was writing this paragraph, because I’d forgotten who was who again. Help me.

Actually, no, screw your sympathy! I’m still smart! I may have Saradon/Weaver face blindness, but at least I know that Ecuador is on the equator and the Polish word for “sausage” isn’t “sausage.” This isn’t me singling out one team either, folks, this was a common omission/answer tonight!

Brewmasters Bar & Grill
301 W Martin St
Raleigh, NC 27601
Thursdays: 7:00 PM
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10:19 PM, April 10, 2014
Scores
Eastbound and Lick Ur Boom Down (Whip Crack Sound Effect!) 75

Pug Life 53

Cobra Kai 53

Bears, Beets, and Battlestar Galactica 51

Oh, The Huge Manatee! 49

Duck Duck Goose 37

Yanks 34

Ho-Ho the Wonderdog!


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Quiz Schedule
Brewmasters Bar & Grill, Thursdays at 7pm
Hobert (Ho-Ho the Wonderdog!)

Hello, All!

My name is Hobert, and I'm your Quizmaster for Geeks Who Drink at Brewmasters Bar & Grill.

Here are some fun stats about me, ripped straight from my rookie trading card:

Name: Hobert Thompson

Height: a mean 6ft

Weight: a mean 200lbs

Shoe size: an average 10 1/2

Skills: Reading questions out loud, improv comedy-ing, film making, outdoorsmanship, horse wrangling, and listing.

Fun Fact: had his life long fear of snakes proved right after a snake bit his face.

Good morning Quiz-campers! Counselor/Quizmaster Hobert here with your quiz recap for Brewmasters Bar and Grill!

Spring has officially “sprung” or whatever it does, and the warm, pleasant air is choked with the pollen of thousands of trees trying to get it on. Here in Raleigh, NC, this weather, for some reason, inspires our populous to throw on exercise clothes and hit the pavement. Every single weekend it seems, there is a new 5K, half-marathon, marathon, color run, underwear run, or that one race where people try to run while eating a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts. And I’m not even exaggerating. There is literally a new one every weekend where the streets are closed off, and life comes to a crashing stop so people can participate in the latest fitness craze.

Look, I know I’m a cynical jerk who spends his free time lounging in front of the TV, but I just don’t understand the appeal of the fun run. Charity run? Yeah sure, I can get behind that. But paying to do something you can do for free, only in the street? Nah, man. Can’t you see that man has been running away from running since our time began?

Initially, man’s ability to stand on two legs and run long distances was an evolutionary advantage. Sure, other animals have us in speed over short bursts, but we can always beat them in the long game, waiting till they tire out before we surround them and club them to death with sticks. But as soon as man could run, he found ways to get out of it. For example:

Agriculture: man planting food so he didn’t have to chase it.

Horses and other pack animals: finding animals we could trick into running while we sat on them.

Cities: putting all the stuff we might want to run to into one area, so we didn’t have to go as far.

Wheeled vehicles: horses without all the sass.

Kitchen appliances: not only do we not want to chase food; we want it to last longer so we don’t have to resort to chasing it as often. Also, we don’t want to run to get fuel to cook the food. Also, we want radiation to cook the food, so we don’t even have to stand near it while it cooks.

The internet: We don’t want to run after entertainment, sex, objects we want to buy, friends, news, mail, or artwork that depicts characters from Sherlock and Seinfeld in erotic situations.

I’m not suggesting that man is slowly turning into the blob people from Wall*E. I somewhat try to keep an active lifestyle. I’m just saying, if you want a fun, outdoor, exercisey experience, go for a hike or something. Running in a herd down a path is what our prey does. I guess what I’m saying is be careful this weekend, Raleigh runners. You’re going to get pretty tired running that race, and I’ll have had all day to rest up, and I’ll be out there after that race, stick in hand.

Tonight’s Quiz

We had a real barn-burner tonight, folks. And I don’t mean that in an Amish tragedy way. Seven teams competed for our top prizes, and after their successful jokering of the second round, Eastbound and Lick Ur Boom Down (Whip Crack Sound Effect!) pretty much had first place sown up.

But did the rest of the teams give up? Hell no! They soldiered on and to great success! Especially Cobra Kai, a veteran team that loves to argue with me (even when they are wrong, bless their hearts) and Pug Life, a team made up of a young Raleigh-ite and his Minnesota based parents. At the end of our eight rounds, Pug Life and Cobra Kai found themselves locked in a tie, so we decided (after they proved they were apparently unable to answer any of my sudden death questions) to have a good ol’fashioned dance off. Pug Life, forcing up its father figure, proved that fifty-year-old white guys can break it down impressively to Grand Master Flash and Furious Five. Great work, Pug Life. You really earned your prize, and I hope you can return to Minnesota and tell all your friends how weird NC is.


Brewmasters Bar & Grill
301 W Martin St
Raleigh, NC 27601
Thursdays: 7:00 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
9:27 PM, April 03, 2014
Scores
Lick Ur Boom Boom Down fka Ron Paul's Orthopedic Shoes 76

Fenga Papit 74

Sha'Dynasty 70

Poop Soup 54

Z Team 53

MDC 50

Ranch Is Stinky 47

My Moustache is Better Than Your Moustache 46

Cowboy Boots and Indians 36

Ho-Ho the Wonderdog!


Facebook
Web

Quiz Schedule
Brewmasters Bar & Grill, Thursdays at 7pm
Hobert (Ho-Ho the Wonderdog!)

Hello, All!

My name is Hobert, and I'm your Quizmaster for Geeks Who Drink at Brewmasters Bar & Grill.

Here are some fun stats about me, ripped straight from my rookie trading card:

Name: Hobert Thompson

Height: a mean 6ft

Weight: a mean 200lbs

Shoe size: an average 10 1/2

Skills: Reading questions out loud, improv comedy-ing, film making, outdoorsmanship, horse wrangling, and listing.

Fun Fact: had his life long fear of snakes proved right after a snake bit his face.

Hello, all, and welcome to this installment of the Brewmasters Bar and Grill quiz recap! Now, I know that this won’t come as a surprise to you, my adoring quizzers and quiz-groupies, but I was never what you’d call “cool” as a younger man. My signature blend of awkward-yet-annoying wasn’t as finely honed in grade school, and I was, tragically, often the target of bullies.

if only I’d had the confidence back then to just stand up to my bullies and insult their mothers! Tonight’s round 6 was on the timeless art of the “Yo Mama” joke, a zinger format that has amused and insulted in equal measure generations of kids. Now, when you’re a kid, it’s pretty hard for you muster the wit to construct a really good Yo Mama, so you always have to pick them up from family, friends, or sadly now defunct Wild’n’Out.

Well, I don’t want my kids to suffer the embarrassment of having a Yo Mama everyone’s heard before, so I’ve written one specially for my kids to use. Let us peer into the future, and see Lil’ Hobert dealing with a bully…

Bully: Hey, Lil’ Hobert! I heard yo mama was so dumb she tried to eat an iPhone because she heard it was an apple!

Gaggle of kids: Ohhhhhh, burn!

Lil’ Hobert: Well. I heard yo mama lacked so much foresight, that when she was in her twenties she was convinced by socioeconomic pressures that working right out of college was somehow beneath her, and she viewed going back to school for a masters degree as a way to put off having to “settle.” Then, she racked up hundreds of thousands of dollars of student debt, and in a job market that has increasing devalued higher education as a job stipulation, she found herself taking unpaid internships to find any work experience in her field, yo. Then after all that, she ended up working in the service industry anyway, and the experience left her bitter and unable to afford larger ticket items like cars and houses!

Gaggle of kids: Geez, Lil’ Hobert, back off him, ok? He’s crying.

Lil’ Hobert: No…I bet you mama studied something like creative writing!

Bully: *weeps*

Lil’ Hobert: I bet that her meager savings was again depleted by the economic stress of having a child! And despite all this, because no one has ever told anyone otherwise, you’re going to repeat her mistakes, making you equally lacking in foresight as your poor, tragic mama!

Gaggle of kids: Damn, Lil’ Hobert. You’re mean…

Lil’ Hobert: Also, yo mama so fat, the reason they had to stretch The Hobbit into three movies is because she was in it!

Gaggle of kids/Bully: Daaaaaaaaaaamn!

Tonights Quiz

Tonight we had nine teams facing off for our top prizes. Immediately after starting, a schism erupted amongst the members of Ron Paul’s Orthopedic Shoes (they had too many people) and some of their members left to join Fenga Papit, causing RPO to pick a new name: Lick Ur Boom Boom Down (formerly known as) Ron Paul's Orthopedic Shoes. Despite this unwieldy name, LUBBDRPO stayed neck and neck with quiz veterans Sha’dynasty.

Sha’dynasty scored high in our early rounds, but faltered just slightly enough in the later rounds to let Fenga Papit and LUBBDRPO chip away at their lead. LUBBDRPO and Fenga Papit won the night!

Notes From Tonight’s Quiz

In tonight’s visual round of identifying celebrities who are currently in their 90’s we learned that our quizzers have a form of face blindness that prevents them from recognizing elderly people. Ranch is Stinky had a good strategy, though, just guess Betty White for every one. It earned them one point, and shows us a truth about our lives: at a certain point in aging, we will all start to look like Betty White.

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