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Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
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12:25 PM, November 20, 2014
Scores
Pastafarians 84

Beef Hole 83

Extruded Plastic Dingus 82

Good enough for guvment work 79

Crack Suicide Squad 78

Butt Rangers 70

I'm missing livestream of the National Book Awards for this? 69

Sister Wives 68

Wang Walker 66

#fangirlproblems 65

Back Porch Philosophers 65

The Blizzard that ate Buffalo Bill 64

How deep? Balls Deep! 60

Trivia Wonder Super Friends 60

Alex Trebek's Mustache 57

Black Ice 56

Cuntswaylow 53

Switchblades 52

Talk nerdy to me 51

Quizzled 49

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


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Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

[this space available for expensive advertisements]

Usually when you have pasta and beef on top of anything, the result is pleasant. I mean, unless you're vegan, or the very rare celiac sufferer. My condolences. But at the top of our night we had Pastafarians narrowly edging out Beef Hole who nearly repeated last week's victory. Sweet for pasta, bitter for... whatever a beef hole really is.

There are some questions we simply do not need to understand. Like why the Hollywood press is always trying to play make-up for underrating prior films by overrating director's new less-impressive films. Not that I am talking about any Christopher Nolan in particular... I mean any director in particular. No, I didn't mean that personally, sometimes I call film directors “Christopher Nolans” as a metaphor.

So, in my infinite wisdom of so many subjects, I have to admit that when it comes to dog breeds, I'm a little bit dog-racist. They all pretty much look the same. I kind of understand the concept of a Great Dane, and am pretty sure I could pick a dachshund out of a lineup, but really, they are four-legged hairy things to me. More importantly, four-legged hairy things that I don't understand. Seriously, I try telling a dog a pun, and the thing just looks at me like they don't speak English. At least a cat walks away in disgust, which obviously means cats are uppity hipsters who think themselves too cool for puns.

Last night's round eight, that was a killer. Who knew geography and well-known acting roles could be so difficult? It's like we have never heard of a certain famous canal that allows sea travel between North and South America... So I could have actually played that Van Halen song, and most people would still miss that.

Hugs and kisses, and don't miss out next week! You don't have to work Thursday, so you definitely need to be here!

Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
1:31 PM, November 17, 2014
Scores
Erotic throat punch 89

Dick Bangdana 82

Baby oil broke the internet long before Kim Kardashian 80

Butts, Butts, Butts, 76

Cohen Macauliflower 76

Only 59 weeks 'til next Christmas 76

Cheeses of Nazareth 75

Rob Leifeld's idealic woman 74

Topical Humor 73

Senor Scholls 73

The Blumpkin Patch Kids 73

Warmer outside than inside your ex 73

Dehydrated Young'ns 72

Liz has Spoken 70

We met at the dog park 69

Bofus 68

We made comets our bitch 67

Scandanavian Dolphin 67

Shut up no you shut up 62

Renee Zellweger's old face 61

M&D Balls in yo mouf 27

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


Twitter
Facebook
Web

Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

[this space available for expensive advertisements]

It is one of those days where I am just going to have to quote my dad.

“I'm making this quick”

Interpret that as you will.

Okay, but seriously. What an incredible night. We had a surprise runaway winner who just managed to get an edge on the rest of the teams each round. How? They've seen from pretty mediocre films to earn their win, that's for sure. So a well-deserved congratulations to Erotic Throat Punch, or as David Carradine used to call it, Tuesday.

Too soon?

And in second, Dick Bangdana who are heating up recently. It must be an inverse weather thing.

Hugs & Kisses!

Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
1:32 PM, November 13, 2014
Scores
Beef Hole 91

Crack Suicide Squad 88

Fragile X Files 86

Death By Snoo Snoo 86

Fuck you, Wes 83

Back Porch Philosophers 83

Joseph Smith's 40 under 14 club 83

Topical Humor 82

Sister Wives 82

Shart-nado 81

Rent a Dildo 81

Trivia Wonder Super Friends 80

Dumb and Dumberererer 79

Products of Conception 79

#fangirlproblems 78

Homestar Runner and the Poopsmiths 74

Off Contantly 74

Putin's Gay for Ukraine 73

Nigeria doesn't have Ebola, dumbass 73

It's Britney Bitch 70

Holy Comet, Batman 70

We don't know yet 70

Talk Nerdy To Me 69

Krusty Krew 60

Twisted Epiphany 47

Green Bean 45

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


Twitter
Facebook
Web

Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

[this space available for expensive advertisements]

There was something subtle in our round seven about Presidential and Vice-Presidential debates that I am hoping someone picked up on. Personally, I hate “debates” with a passion and try to avoid them. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy real debates, but the political circus nonsense that is trotted in front of us is completely useless. That is, unless you can tell the true character of a person based on their public speaking tactics. It's a subtle art, but it was terrifyingly obvious in the round. Reagan, Dole, Love... All the same person. That's right, though the newly gerrymandered into being Utah's new representative in congress was not in this round, two of her prior incarnations were. Puppet candidates. People so absolutely brainless that they are used by much more powerful entities to carry out government meant to harm us.

Sounds like some whacko conspiracy theory bullshit, right? I wish it was. It's all in the line that both Reagan and Dole loved to throw down in debates. “Oh, there he goes again...” when they have been called out on something stupid that they have done. It is something used to minimize the statements of their opponent and make it look like they are the victim of an attack. The crazy thing, Mia used that bullshit line when Mr. Owens wasn't even attacking her.

If I believed in a god, I'd be praying for us. Perhaps I'll take up Satanism, or Cthuluism. It's worth a shot, right?

You know who made a deal with Cthulu? Beef Hole, that's who! They got the win, edging out Crack Suicide Squad. See you next time!

(FYI, this originally had a scathing rant about people not paying attention to the things I see a billion times a week on the social medias, but thanks to glitches and shit not saving, you were saved from that. So I suppose all you Satanists that hate my ranting got what you wished for. Thank your dark lord for that.)

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