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Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
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11:19 AM, September 29, 2014
Scores
Salu-Latte 88

Vagina: The original mancave 82

It's not boobs on the ground, it's a pair in the air 81

The better half 77

The Mayoneggs 77

Farva's Shenanigans 77

In dog beers we've only had one 76

Dick Bangdana 75

May we offer you a fish sandwich 75

Snakes on a Crane 75

Jeter has a small peter 74

There is no team name, only Zuul! 69

Topical Humour 69

Dicks on paper 69

Ms. Pacman Swallows 67

603 apples 66

White House fence jumpers 65

Vincent Van Gogh fuck yourself 64

The pretty half 63

We were too lazy to think up a team name 63

Tequila Mockingbird 49

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


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Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

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Meryl Streep. Legendary. We all know her well. Put you on the spot to name 8 of her Oscar nominations, and watch stress rise. It's okay. It wasn't essential to ace that round for a win. Test pressure. It's that normal anxiety to come up with an answer when you feel you're in a time crunch. Which, I'm also going to blame for... Every single bonus question last night. My apologies, I feel like it's something I did to make you tense.

It couldn't have been the Baha Men, because that was much later in the game.

Again, my apologies for allowing the Baha Men to infiltrate our fortress of solitude.

Twice.

I'd blame Genius Playlists, but we all know that's not true.

Then it would have been U2, right? You guys and your first-world problems. It's so cute. It's always good to see your faces on Sunday. You're so mellow. The weekend has provided you serenity. Your biggest worries are whether to have fries or salad with your delicious fried foods.

The lead swapped hands a few times, a team had to swap their team name due to a bizarre duplication of names, and we finally found a way to use a Super Troopers reference in a team name that wasn't guaranteed to jinx the team. Trust me, it's not me, it's the name. It's one of the weakest jokes in the film, so obviously it should be avoided.

In the end, Salu-Latte pulled off the win, with Vagina: the original mancave in second. All of you, big love, and I'll look forward to seeing you again next week. 

Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
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10:14 AM, September 25, 2014
Scores
Mitch's bitches 80

Jelly Belly Flop 79

Crack Suicide Squad 78

We like pumpkin flavoured everything 77

Trivia Wonder Super Friends 74

Pumpkin-flavoured cock ring 73

Butt shaped iPhones 72

Don't cook bacon naked 70

Bazinga 69

Products of conception 68

Drinky and the Brain 66

Dickbags and Twatsickles 62

And then there were 3 61

#fangirlproblems 60

Semper Lattes 56

The hot tub's too hot 50

Cock-Holsters 47

Purple Cows 47

Goats who drink 39

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


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Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

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Autumn! Yes, the most wonderful time of the year. We still have longer days for a bit, plenty of sunshine, and you can actually enjoy that sunshine due to the temperatures being below surface-of-the-sun hot. It's time for the final garden harvests, the apples are dropping, and everything is good in the world. Also, we have the pagan holiday season upon us. So... Much... Excitement... Can't... Contain!

But I will. Like one of the teams, a big thing many look forward to is the flavour of fall. Yes, We like pumpkin flavoured everything. Pumpkin is such an underrated flavour. I'm looking forward to pumpkin scones with gin & ginger marmalade, pumpkin pie with Captain Morgan, pumpkin spaghetti with a glass of pumpkin ale. I always cook with liquor. Sometimes it also goes in the food. My pumpkin pie is actually “Rumkin Pie,” due to the copious amount of rum and my own home-distilled vanilla. But one thing that I just can't get behind: pumpkin lattes. Sorry, coffee is meant to have one flavour, and that is coffee. I don't even want my milk flavoured, as that takes away from the coffee goodness. But everything else we want to pumpkin flavour, I'm right there with you.

Granted, it still won't get me to eat an Oreo cookie.

No.

It's people!

So, our pumpkin-flavoured teams started off strong and held their own way. Pumpkin-flavoured cock ring nearly made a comeback in round eight, beating everyone in that round. But it was the unexpected finish (that's what she said) for Mitch's Bitches at the end of the night, with Jelly Belly Flop in a close second, and Crack Suicide Squad looking on from third.

So enjoy the perfect season, and be sure to mark your calendars for:

 

and remember, if someone asks you if you're a god, you say YES!

Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
11:23 AM, September 22, 2014
Scores
Adrian Peterson beat me and I turned out fine 83

Non-dairy panty creamers 82

Tuna LaFetus 77

The Rural Jurors 75

Fleetwood Mac Sex Pants 74

Topical humor 74

Dainty queef 74

Knights who say ni! 74

The curmudgeons 73

Vladimir Poopin 71

Hanging with Robin Williams 71

The Stunning Polygamist Ninja Burglars 68

The Clap 67

Dick Bangdana 67

Bubba & Narlene 66

Team Not Dead 65

Culo Commanders 59

The dragon busters 59

Epilectic leisure 22

We be german 22

Some sort of dimension 15

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


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Web

Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

[this space available for expensive advertisements]

Last Sunday, I was on a plane heading back home here to the beautiful SL,UT. Jetlag, disorientation of changing eight hours back in time, and extreme exhaustion. Not bitching, just drawing a contrast to a week later, as I'm surrounded by so many of my favourite people. Yes, spoiler alert, that is you guys!

I missed you. I really did. Despite the incredible access to Belgian beer that I am now missing, it is good to be back.

And so, we kicked it off with a round on interesting “occupations” people have these days. Although, seriously, could anyone actually make a living as a marijuana “critic?” Even if you ever got paid, you'd eat and smoke that $1.07 Google Ads money so fast that you'd owe PayPal an overdraft fee. What we did reinforce last night is that American currency is phony. Completely phony. $2.5 billion for Minecraft? $4 billion in salaries for concussion victims to stand in a line and run into each other like naked mole rats? But you know what, it doesn't stop there. People talk about how expensive cities like London are. Indeed, rents are pretty damn steep. But for a non-scientific observation, let me tell you how I walked around London for five days with 100 Pounds Sterling and still had cash in my pocket despite buying souvenirs, doing bizarre things like mailing postcards to the U.S., and drinking beer every possible opportunity. I couldn't spend money fast enough. Even picking up dinner tabs, and there was money. But less than a week back, and I've dropped over $100 in cash that I truly cannot account for. A couple lunches? Picking up a drink here and there. I could tell you the problem, but let's not soapbox too much.

Let's talk about way too many close scores. Fortunately, there was a burst of separation in the end that put Adrian Peterson beat me and I turned out fine in a narrow spot on top for the win. Just behind, Non-dairy panty creamers captured the second-place prize. And then there was everyone else, with very few points separating top to bottom. Thanks for brining it!

See you next time!

 

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