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Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
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12:21 PM, October 30, 2014
Scores
Non-Constential Volounteering 80

Crack Suicide Squad 79

Fuck you, Wes! 78

Renee Zellweger unveils Halloween Costume too soon 77

Nick Better Have Ebola 77

BEEFHOLE 76

Team Brad-Ass 75

Why, Desarae? WHY? 75

Pleasin' Heathens 74

Rick Rammer and the Balongna curtain 74

Trey Burkes Baby Arm 72

#Fangirl Problems 71

I got a fever 68

These aren't the beers you're looking for 68

Sandwich 66

Switchblades 66

That fucking marlins guy 61

I Quit My Job Today - IN STYLE 59

Scorekeeper has seen most of our team shirtless 56

The B-Sharps 55

Big Cottonwood Killahs 51

Intermural Champs! 51

Seriously. Call Him. Need a Friend? Call Mark @ 262 894 1987 50

for (Awesome:Trigger.new) 38

The Chairman
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Quiz Schedule
A Bar Named Sue, Tuesdays @ 8
Christopher (The Chairman)

Quizmaster Chairman is a fantastic human being. Seriously. Already a household name, he spends most of his time imagining how cool it would be if he donated to charity, adopted orphaned children & did that surgery on Angelina Jolie's boobs.

A Bar Named Sue has named him "The Quizmaster we were assigned" & Piper Down has named him "That guy who fills in sometimes for our other guy." The customers of these places have raved, "He didn't totally fuck up my night," and "I want that man to plant his seed in me."

He has two critically acclaimed graphic novels published internationally, with a third in the works. Perhaps his greatest acheivement is that they are still selling for full retail on Amazon.

He lives alone with his two cats.

Gooooooood afternoon, Pipers and piperettes!

It's always an absolute blast when I get to visit your lovely home base and take on the tremendous task of entertaining you fine folks. It was barrells of fun all around and despite all this, we bid a fond farewell, for now, to SLC's favorite scorekeeper, Deserae. I like to think we done ya proud, and we'll miss ya!

As always it was a close game all around, but we had to crown a winner. So big congrats to Non-Consential Volounteers! They rose to the top, beating out Crack Suicide Squad by a mere point. Next time, gang! There's always next time.

So what happened last night?

- I woke you up really well to start things off. I'm used to karaoke sound systems that require me to do my best Linda Lovelace impression in order to be heard.

- Seriously, I don't care how much you argue, "sheep" is not comprised of the letters in "Halloween." So stop. Just stop.

- It is still a mystery how Stevie Wonder knows that she's lovely.

- "Nick Better Have Ebola" wins best team name for me. You don't win anything, other than my childlike lughter and delight.

- "Big Cottonwood Killahs" didn't assault me in the parking lot after harassing them mercilessly about how ridiculous that name is... an I'm still looking at you "Brad-ass."

- Mark, in the team listed to your left, apparently loves voicemails. I've edited his number out of the team name. FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

- Yeah, it took us a bit longer than usual to score round 8. It is entirely your fault for what you did to poor Deserae.

Well, hey! That wraps it up for me. Thank you again for listening to my ramblings. So, make sure you head on back this Sunday for the triumphant return of Dr. Nick!

Peas,
-QM Chairman!

Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
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11:51 AM, October 27, 2014
Scores
Gravy Fever 78

CDC: We got this 75

#teambutler 74

Prime Divisors 74

Coco and the sex kittens 74

The ebola miracle weight loss program 74

Topical Humour 73

Spermologers 73

Dick Bangdana 72

The Virgin Snake 68

The Lead Balloony 68

Expect nothing and never be disappointed 58

Monkey Poop Zombie Apocalypse 58

It's a totally different kind of flying altogether 52

Boy Band 52

Metal Dots 38

Coming in the rear 29

Mr. Davidson 23

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


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Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

[this space available for expensive advertisements]

It's the week of Pagan Christmas and all through Piper Down
All the drinkers were drinking with nary a frown.
The crowd funneled in and sat upon their stools
To prove once again that they are no fools.
While I with my mic and playlist of tunes
Prepared Halloween songs full of goblins and goons.
The visual round was a stumper, they say.
Though not quite the thumping as Saints gave Green Bay...
By the end of the night there was one thing that's clear
Ebola is out, Gravy Fever is here!

I'm not entirely sure what that disease is, buy I know I don't want to catch it. Sounds like an irrational case of wanting to eat at chain restaurants. It is Halloween week, so of course I needed to stump you with quiet characters and nail polish colors. Never fear though, the top ten teams were within ten points of each other, causing me to have a mild panic and recount before confirming that Gravy Fever did manage to clear a three-point lead for the win, and CDC: We got this! narrowly beat the rest for a secure second-place finish. I feel bad for those in 7th, 9th, and 10th, as those spots seem so far from the top despite being mere points behind.

Happy Halloween, and remember to be safe, give out tons of candy, and be respectful of others' bad costume choices.

Unless they're racist or stupid. Then mock those. 

Piper Down
1492 S State St
Salt Lake City, UT 84115
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
10:13 PM, October 25, 2014
Scores
Carpathian Bobsled Team sponsored by Ray's Occult 60

Tell him about the Twinkie 52

You can keep your $5 52

Bobbin' for panties 48

Ain't fraid of no ghost 46

Who you gonna call? We don't fucking care 41

Gozer Worshippers 29

I couldn't help it, it just popped in there 20

Doctor Nick: Thymelord


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Quiz Schedule
Sundays & Wednesdays: Piper Down 7:30pm.
Nick (Doctor Nick: Thymelord)

Nick is one of the rare people who was born in Las Vegas long before it became Disneyland for degenerates. His growing discomfort for heat, and ongoing feud with some Canadian boy named Celine Dion led him to the land of Zion. Upon discovering this wasn't the same land of Zion mentioned in The Matrix, he decided to make the best of the situation and began hosting pub quizzes. 

His hobbies include drinking, eating, teaching children to swear, cooking, and being one of the last people on earth who thinks CDs are the only way to buy music. His turnoffs are walks on the beach, because that combines sun, sand, and countless bacterias growing in the moist heat. 

By day he looks at an endless supply of MBA student assignments and weeps for the future. His most recent inappropriate comment to a student was, "I could take your business proposal to run an armoury for Live-Action-Role-Players seriously if it wasn't for the 793 grammatical errors which impeded my giggling."

He's not a licensed therapist, but he's happy to take a look inside your head and solve your problems. Better yet, come out to a quiz and drink your troubles away.

[this space available for expensive advertisements]

...knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!

Ghostbusters. That film celebrating its 30th anniversary, and its sequel that actually managed to put more Bobby Brown on a soundtrack than should be allowed by law. Eight rounds on the epic films managed to stump our competitors quite well.

The big win belongs to Carpathian Bobsled Team sponsored by Ray's Occult Books, who had an incredibly dominant round eight. In second, Tell him about the Twinkie made a great showing and a tiebreaker finish ahead of You can keep your $5. Happy Halloween to all you worshippers of Gozer!

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