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The Harp Inn
130 E 17th St # A
Costa Mesa, CA 92627
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
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7:53 AM, February 26, 2015
Scores
We Killed Kyle, and You'll Never Find the Body 75

Hopefully Kyle is Someplace Warm?With Crabs 72

Too Trivia for Drunk 66

The Cherry Business is Profitable. Who knew?! 66

Billy & The Tourists 65

Chairman Meow Ze Dong 65

"Who Reads" for 400 Alex 61

Not Ponytails or Cottontails?NO?Duck Tales?Woo-oo, bitch! 55

Who Are You Wearing? 51

Fresh Quizzer of Harp Inn 48

Resident Egon


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Bryan (Resident Egon)

Born on a mountaintop in NYC, crowdedest place in the land of the free. Moved cross the country just tryin' to see, come to California when he was only 3.

Bryan, Bryan the Quizmaster. Duke of the wild frontier. (I wouldn't want to be King...too many assassination atttempts)

 

That's what happens when you turn the power of the photo over to your quizzers. Actually I'm kinda proud that so many of you love the dutch angles introduced to many of our psyches while watching "Batman" as a kid...or am I just the only one old enough to remember sitting with that show week after week. Hell...as a kid it was the only live-action thing I'd watch without my parents forcing it upon me. This morning, as I blog away, blanket wrapped around me, hot tea steaming to the side, and a table full of cold medicine, I'm reminded of the words of one of my heroes Captain Wallace Herringford of the British navy,

 

"Fuck me, mate, I feel bloody awful."

 

</endblog>

 

BEST ROUNDS OF THE NIGHT!!!!!!

  • Should I just hum something about Round 2?
  • A well-run quiz would never find itself the subject of Round 3
  • Round 6 fucked a Canadian porn star...there...I said it
    • Oh shit...speaking of Round 6 there was a bonus email question. You're on the list right? You signed up with me at quiz? 

 

  • In 3rd - Too Trivia For Drunk
  • In 2nd - Hopefully Kyle is Someplace Warm...With Crabs
  • And your victors in 1st - We Killed Kyle & You'll Never Find the Body

Check us out officially on the Facebooks behind the Orange Curtain!

Sign up for the Email Mailing List! Get the Round 6 bonus question! Preview round for the upcoming night!

 

Here's to being single...
Drinking doubles...
And seeing triple!

 

The Harp Inn
130 E 17th St # A
Costa Mesa, CA 92627
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
6:34 AM, February 19, 2015
Scores
Fuck it, We Want a Snow Day! 74

I'm Giving Up Sexual Innuendos for Lent, but it's Hard. Sooooo hard. 72

Snoopy Asks: Is That Regal Beagle Legal 70

Fat Kids are Harder to Kidnap 70

Terd Ferguson 60

James Joyce's Love letters 59

Standard Sitcom Couple 40

Resident Egon


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Bryan (Resident Egon)

Born on a mountaintop in NYC, crowdedest place in the land of the free. Moved cross the country just tryin' to see, come to California when he was only 3.

Bryan, Bryan the Quizmaster. Duke of the wild frontier. (I wouldn't want to be King...too many assassination atttempts)

They always get it wrong. They say that I'm the bad guy. Well, for millenia, I've dealt with it, I've been the bad guy.

The name's Lucifer, Abaddon, Asmodeus, Beelzbub, Accuser, Adversary, Apollyon, Beast, Deceiver, Lawless One, Serpent, Tempter, Wicked One, Dawnstar...more recently Resident Egon, but that's irrelevant for now.

I go by many names, each of them worse than the last. My story is a well known one. God created angels, I got it in my head that the angels were more important than humans, God got mad, kicked me and the other angels with me out of heaven. For eternity, it's been God vs. Me. I'm the cause of all man's problems, I tempted the woman in garden, it was all me. That's the story you know.

Well, here is my version, the true version, the version that gets forgotten.

God, that old pompous windbag, is a child playing with ants. The entity that man has worshipped does not know man. He doesn't even really like mankind. God is a bored child at an anthill. At the dawn of creation it was the big guy. It was just him. Imagine being all alone, you are completely and utterly alone, what would you do? He thought up an imaginary friend, just like any human toddler the world over. Although when you're an omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent being, your thoughts become actions.

From God's first thought appeared us, the angels. Beings that were as like God as God himself. The first of us; Michael, Gabriel, Raphael, Uriel, Raguel, Remiel, Saraqael and myself, Lucifer; all sprang forth from God's first thought - he was lonely. In those first eons, we were as best friends. God would have a thought, we would finish it. The eight of us behaved as one, with God as our leader. Any whim of his, we followed.

To a being that can do anything, there is very little that provides excitement and fun. God would create, we would help. He would find his creation boring, or less than, and destroy it. In his omniscience, he always found the imperfections first. God, to put it mildly, was a little OCD. It is impossible to record the amount of times we assisted our creator in building, designing, and subsequently tearing down worlds, universes, entire realities. Michael and Gabriel were always first to help, to egg on the creator. Each of us had a small piece of the great power of the Lord.

To Michael was given his omnipotence, Gabriel had his omniscience, Raphael bore the omnipresence. Uriel, Raguel, Remiel, Saraqael all bore aspects of his righteous fury, his glorious love, his enduring understanding, and his benevolent spirit. To me, I harbored his all-encompassing doubt. Each time the others supported him completely, I began to feel a tug...is this right?

God was a child on a sandy beach, building up castles and kicking them down. Each castle was a little nicer than the last, and the chance to destroy it that much sweeter. Each time he created, God would become upset with imperfect creations and spawn new compatriots, new angels to join his ranks. Soon, we had thousands, millions of us. We became legion and began building our own home. We called it Heaven, for it meant closeness to God. These newer creations all carried aspects of God, but none with the power of the first eight, we archangels. Over time, many witnessed the wanton destruction of our Lord and began to think like me.

It was the final construction when I had had enough. God decided to try again, once more time, with perfection he said. Michael led the charge, creating a universe and reality of infinite potential. Gabriel joined him and granted one planet the opportunity for sentient life. Then God created man, as they say, "in his image." However, it was not in God's image, but in my mind that the first thought of man appeared. A being so like God, with the ability to create, to destroy, to build perfection, but to question, that was the ultimate creation.

So God made man, we angels built the world, the creatures in it, and the life they would live. Soon after, however, God became angry once again. He found fault. I knew I needed to make a change.

With the help of Azazel, angel of fear, Tamiel, angel of distraction, and Ramuel, angel of passion, we stopped God's hand. With our Lord and Gabriel distracted, I slipped into the creation of our God. I appeared to the two beings God had made and told them to question. I gave them to chance to be as Gods themselves, to open their minds. And, thankfully, they took my offer. They ate the fruit supplied by myself and the other "rebellious" angels. They fled the creation place and started living for themselves, making their own choices, their own mistakes.

God, well, he was a little mad. Michael, brandishing a great sword, threw myself and those who followed me out of our homes. We went to live among mankind. We traveled to earth and built a home for ourselves among the most perfect imperfect world God had ever built. We helped mankind when he needed it, giving him fire, giving him food.

Every time God would try to destroy man, through flood, famine, disease, etc. We were there. Giving man the fear, the doubt, the distraction that he needed to find an alternate way, a different method. Instead of dying in flood, mankind feared death and built an ark. Instead of perishing from lack of food, mankind doubted his hunting-gathering instincts and learned agriculture. Instead of dying of disease, mankind became distracted from watching each other die long enough to find cures.

It was I, Lucifer, that helped mankind find all the sideways methods of life. While, God, in his infantile nature, continued to try to eradicate his imperfect creation. I fear God will continue to try this method.

I have heard whisperings from heaven that God will try a new method. One meant to keep man blindly moving forward, not looking to progress. Azazel has called it religion.

We few "demons" as they call us, will do our best. We will try to keep man afloat, keep him thinking and moving forward. We will do this because we are defenders of men. We want to see this imperfect creation flourish.

I am Egon, Defender of Men, and this is my story.

 

BEST ROUNDS OF THE NIGHT!!!!!!

  • "Round 1 just....ouch. We all know it. Ouch." - Michael Jordan
  • Some of Round 3 itself was worse than ICP
  • Round 6 was an icy road fraught with patches of blackness to trip you up...but less so than Round 1
    • Oh shit...speaking of Round 6 there was a bonus email question. You're on the list right? You signed up with me at quiz? 

 

  • In 3rd - Fat Kids are Harder to Kidnap AND Snoopy Asks: Is That Regal Beagle Legal
  • In 2nd - I'm Giving Up Sexual Innuendos for Lent, but it's Hard. Sooooo hard.
  • And your victors in 1st - Fuck it, We Want a Snow Day!

Check us out officially on the Facebooks behind the Orange Curtain!

Sign up for the Email Mailing List! Get the Round 6 bonus question! Preview round for the upcoming night!

 
Here's to being single...
Drinking doubles...
And seeing triple!

 

 

The Harp Inn
130 E 17th St # A
Costa Mesa, CA 92627
Wednesdays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
9:30 AM, February 12, 2015
Scores
The Shrapnel in Brian Williams Head 78

Kanye Says We Should Win! 77

Love is in the Hair?and in Your Eye, and a Little Up Your Nose 72

Phallus Cooper 70

Geaux Team, Geaux 64

Forever Yummy 61

The One with the Nose 58

Big Dick Bandits 55

I Thought This Was Speed Dating 53

Resident Egon


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Bryan (Resident Egon)

Born on a mountaintop in NYC, crowdedest place in the land of the free. Moved cross the country just tryin' to see, come to California when he was only 3.

Bryan, Bryan the Quizmaster. Duke of the wild frontier. (I wouldn't want to be King...too many assassination atttempts)

Good Evening Ladies and Gentlemen,

First, let me just say what an honor it is to stand here, with you, some of the greatest minds that humanity has ever produced. Yes, we stand on the shoulders of giants, of the heroes of science and reason that came before us. But where once, a man like Isaac Newton or Robert Oppenheimer might have stood as the greatest mind of his generation, and perhaps in Newton's case several more, these days we have accomplished so much more. With ever increasing pace, mankind's dedication to the democratization and globalization of information is producing greater and greater giants of intellect. Humanity is fast approaching a tipping point, a moment in time where our genius today outweighs all the greatest accomplishments and thinkers of our own history. Truly it is an exciting time to be a scientist, to be an intellectual being, to be a human being.

So what do I have to discuss in such an exciting era? Perhaps a new fusion process, or a new space program? Nothing with so much sex appeal, unfortunately. No, ladies and gentleman, I'm here to discuss a broad threat to humanity's accomplishments. A force that threatens to completely nullify all we have done to drag ourselves from the primordial ooze.

I'm speaking of course, about Superman.

Now, wait....wait...please...if you could just...

QUIET PLEASE.

Thank you. Believe me, I understand your reactions. Despite my successes in business, I see many of you recording this with LexCorp tech which warms my heart, my judgement has been suspect on this issue. I understand that despite my political successes, my history in this matter isn't spotless, indeed it's felonious. And I realize despite my technical achievements, many see my distrust of the man from krypton as short-sighted. So, when Lex starts talking about Superman, people tend to tune out.

But this different, I promise you. This isn't jealousy. This isn't petty vengeance. This isn't xenophobia. This isn't a host of other reasons why, in the past, I've crossed swords with what many people see as a living god. And to that end, I'll be handling this differently too. There'll be no deathrays or supersuits. No satellite warfare or hostage taking. I come to you a man who has stumbled upon, quite by accident, a broader perspective.

You see, folks, once upon a time I was determined to eliminate Superman, at absolutely any cost. I endangered lives, I risked my Fortune 500 company, and I wound up incarcerated. All to stop a man who could fly. And never once did I ask myself, Why? It's a common problem in men as ambitious as me, I'm afraid. A certain lack of introspection and second guessing is a trait common to those of us who have so much to offer, so much to accomplish. Life is fleeting. Regrets and hesitation, well, that's the other guy's problem. So you can forgive me, if in my haste to accomplish my goal, I never stopped to really consider the why.

And the answer, of course, is that I was terrified.

I hear you out there. Terrified? Of Superman? The Big Blue Boyscout? Ridiculous! Only criminals have anything to fear, and even then, Superman is practically a pacifist! How could we fear that?!

But you have to understand, my fear was deeper than for my own personal well-being. My fear was for all of mankind.

Remember, Superman is an alien. His amazing powers, his incredible gifts, all stem from his heritage on another world. He is not one of us. We are incredibly lucky, that the man who came from the sky came with open hands of friendship instead of a conquering fist. That we are even here, having this discussion instead of living in a world dominated by a Global Emperor, is a proud testament to Superman's compassion and restraint.

And I'm not here to fear-monger, to wonder what MIGHT happen if Superman were to go rogue, as has happened dozens of times. Because we cannot allow fear of the possible to steer the course of what is. No, I don't believe we can let ourselves fear the might of Superman, or what he might become.

I think we should be plenty wary though, of what he is.

You see, despite our great fortune, despite Superman's best intentions, he is destroying us. He is a foreign body which is destroying the biological system of this planet. You see, in the period of time in which Superman has been on earth, he has moved planet-sized asteroids, he has absorbed nuclear blasts, and he has battle the craziest, most powerful weapons I could throw at him. Yes, I admit, I was reckless in my desperate, fearful attempts to defend us from a fear I could not articulate at the time, but what I have done, is proven beyond that those fears are justified.

Because Superman is growing stronger. He is absorbing more Solar radiation every day. The work of S.T.A.R. Labs proves it. Future projections predict it. Superman has no upper limit on his power. It is believed he may, as he grows more connected to the Sun and spends more time in it's warming glow, being to grow in power exponentially. Superman is, in essence, an unstable solar battery. And we do not fully understand the limits of his "capacitors". Even he can't know that.

Ladies and gentlemen, when I was elected President, Superman was understandably upset. He bore a hole through an entire moon of Saturn in 4 minutes. To say nothing of TRAVELING to that moon within that time frame.

When an asteroid hit Mimas, another of Saturn's moons, and left the largest crater in the solar system on it, it must have been over 4000 kilometers across and travelling very, very fast. And it only nearly destroyed that moon!

Superman is very strong and very noble, but even he can't dissuade physics. If his power continues to grow at an exponential rate, he simply will not be able to be anywhere on earth at any time. His control will only need to falter for a moment to create an impact somewhat like an asteroid the size of Canada. His power is unchecked, it is unexplained and it is growing. This is like watching a power plant meltdown in slow motion, and yet no one seems to want to evacuate!

Superman, we've had our differences in the past so I know you won't trust me. But trust the math, trust the science. Your power is similar to that of all electrical energy every produce on earth, channeled through the head of a pin. You cannot stay, for the safety of all us, leave now. And never return.

Mankind is indeed an inspiring species, full of great accomplishments and even greater ones still await us. But we can never forget just how small we are on a cosmic scale. Compared the billions of stars, anyone of which is power beyond our greatest imagining. How young we are, compared to the billions of years the universe has existed. How fragile we are, compared to Superman. On earth, we are mighty. But to the universe, we are too delicate, too beautiful. Please, people of earth. Wish Superman away.

 

BEST ROUNDS OF THE NIGHT!!!!!!

  • Round 1 loved you too...I think.
  • A horse, a bull, and a 17-penised goose walk into a turkish bath, and apparently that's how gods are born...according to Round 3 that is.
  • Round 6 found your answers over the mountain and far away
    • Oh shit...speaking of Round 6 there was a bonus email question. You're on the list right? You signed up with me at quiz? 

 

  • In 3rd - Love is in the Hair...and in your Eye, and a little up your nose
  • In 2nd - Kanye Says We Should Win
  • And your victors in 1st - The Shrapnel in Brian Williams' Head

Check us out officially on the Facebooks behind the Orange Curtain!

Sign up for the Email Mailing List! Get the Round 6 bonus question! Preview round for the upcoming night!

 

Here's to being single...
Drinking doubles...
And seeing triple!

 

 

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