The blog is late,
By several hours.
I could give you an excuse,
or I could give you flowers.

Instead, a poem,
and a hope you'll forgive.
I make mistakes
every day that I live.

Please remember,
all I do is for you,
but my internet went down,
because AT&T is motherfucking bullshit. (I couldn't even watch Netflix, WTF.)

Yes, many things went wrong,
in the eve of May 22.
Even my toilet overflowed,
flooding the bathroom floor with pee and poo.

So forgive me if you can,
and we'll see you next week,
when the blog will be on time,
for all my favorite Drinking Geeks.

-Shayne "Barbie Hammer Penis" Lechelt 

P.S. I love this man with every inch of my heart.

P.P.S. This is Becca now.

I'm running out of things to say to you people

Don't take that as an insult. We're like an old married couple. I don't need to talk to you to show you I love you. I just need to show you my old, saggy nutsack, like old married couples totally do all the time.

Let me tell you, the past couple weeks have been quite rough. But Wednesdays at Billy's always make it better. Because of the chicken wings and beer, not you guys, you vain sons of bitches.

Pretty sweet De Niro impression-off to break the second place tie. There was a clear winner, but The Wen Bebsters still got to go home with $10. Plus, you don't have bronchitis like the dude from Make Mine M.O.D.O.Q. Kind of makes up for not winning their $20. But, while your De Niros were decently entertaining, your minds were lacking and Juicebox Homos w/ Stars In Our Eyes came in first and got that sweet, sweet $30 prize. Damn, Juicebox Homos w/ Stars In Our Eyes. Good for you!

See you nexxxt week! Billy's! 7PM!

-Shayne "Tane" Lechelt

Did you guys notice the drunken man mumbling to my left? He called me a son of a bitch, I heard it. He also called Becca a bitch.

That guy (I'm like 95% sure) is Angry Dad.

You might remember Angry Dad from a few weeks ago. He took issues with the language that I choose to use. The language being some of the best words in the world: Cock, Fuck, Balls, Dick, Bitch, Ass, Butt, Poop, Weiner, Weiner-Fuck, Weiner-Dick, Balls-Dick, Bitch-Dick, Weiner-Poop, Dick-Dick, Butt-Poop, etc.

Yes, the man calling me a son of a bitch under his breath has an issue with me saying bitch in the context of a question.

I really don't know what I have done. On the one hand, you people clearly love me. Like, borderline stalker love me. On the other hand, it seems I'm getting closer and closer to a fist-fight at these things. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME??!

Is it the questions? Look, just because the highest score we could get on this quiz was 76 doesn't mean I'm going to sit around and get called names. That's on you. It's not my fault if you don't know about Manboobs, Diarrhea, or Captain Planet. You should study more.

Top 3 Teams: Congratulations. Do the damn thing. The rest of you, come back next week hungry for a win. I want bloodshed.

I'ma go to bed.

'Night.

-Ain't No SunShayne When She's Gone