...And it was glorious!!! All I had hoped for, and more. You see, this week we had an extra special e-mail bonus prize, a Zipit by Bananagrams. From what the GWD higher ups have told me, and from what I garnered from the package, the Zipit is kindof like having Scrabble in a to-go bag, but the letter tiles are on multi-sided dice. So cool... it's kindof like a flask for an alcoholic: good for the word game addict on the go! So, four teams battled in our epic drunk geek dance off: representatives from Abortion, It Really lets Your Inner Child Out, Lucky Novelty Cleavage, Heywood Jablowme, and Anglo Saxon Culture shook their moneymakers to Snoop's Drop it Like it's Hot.

And it was hot, indeed! (I hope you read that as intended, in the stuffiest, most painfully white voice you could muster.) Although the crowd did appreciate the classic moves Heywood brought out, like the sprinkler, and Abortion's subtle grooves, it became clear that the ladies from Anglo and Cleavage were the two real contenders. The cleavage gal riled up the bar with her crowd work, but after grinding all up on a chair, Anglo Saxon Culture was our clear winner. I've been running quizzes weekly since January, and I've asked for about a thousand dance offs, but no one was game. Last night we had the perfect mix of drunkenness and revelry, and the crowd went wild for it. I can now die a very happy quizmistress! 

We had a new winning team this week, We Are Pornographers. It turns out that their yelling WHAT?!?! Lil Jon style after every question somehow paid off! Coming in second were the hopeful autobiographers Travis' Vagina Memoirs. And, as Forrest Gump would say, that's all I have to say about that.

Nope, it's THUNDER COLON! Such a beautiful team name. I like to think of my JT peeps as my school children, and names like that make me proud. We also had Baby Seal Clubbers (though I'm going to hope that's a reference to that witty meme where the baby seals are out at a dance club) and some bitter lonelyheart folks on team Not So True Love.

The big winners for the night were Bun Dem Program, and Abortion: It Really Lets Your Inner Child Out took second. An honorable mention goes out to Edina Monsoon, the one-woman team who came in fourth place. The Abortion team left before the results were calculated (perhaps they were needed in a dark alley somewhere?) and I couldn't find True Love, either (story of my life.) So, Edina was the de facto 2nd place winner!

Last night's email bonus prize went to Ram Rod, they got a GWD pint glass with the forboding instructions to OBEY YOUR QUIZMASTER. I'm no Andre the Giant, but I think the message still applies =)

Wait... Crap! Love is all you need, according to the Beatles at least. I beg to differ though! True love is a big bottle of silicone-based lubricant with a pump dispenser. That would be much more helpful if an implied-incest demon rapist were to come at ya, anyway.

I was very proud of my teams tonight for doing so well on the Beatles lyric references! The Say When round was tough, though... Gotta make sure you're pretty sure before yelling stop, guys. It's like deodorant- don't raise your hand 'til you're sure! After all, the writers here at GWD are tricksters.

Joshua Tree regulars Lesbian Withdrawal had their first #1 win tonight, very exciting! Dog in a Bathtub kept up their 2nd place streak but hey, there's always next week to try and steal the top spot.

All talk of lube and love aside, I gotta say I had some hate for the powers that be here at Geekaholics, for trying to make me say, "Jai guru deva om [jigh guru day-vuh oohhhhm]" over the mic. Really guys? Really? Go put your face in a jar or something. Bad enough I had to try to pronounce Higgs Boson. I decided to just call it the Higgs-Bosoms. Tune in next week for more mispronunciations and tomfoolery!

• The Royal Hilltop - Aurora 8:00 PM
• Darcy's Bistro & Pub - Denver 8:30 PM
• Prickly Pete's - Denver 8:00 PM
• The Whiskey Bar - Denver 7:00 PM
• The Cheeky Monk - Westminster 9:00 PM
• The Ram (Meridian) - Meridian 9:00 PM
• Lisa's Restaurant & Lounge - Augusta 7:30 PM
• Opal Divine's (Marina) - Austin 10:00 PM
• Opal Divine's (Penn Field) - Austin 10:00 PM