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Weirdo's
12408 North Mopac Expressway
Austin, TX 78758
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3:36 AM, November 14, 2012


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Scores

They May Take Our Trivia, But They Will Never Take Our Freedom! (DQ)	85

Fuck You, Fuck You, Ron's Cool, Fuck You, I'm Out (1st)	81

It's Not Over, It's Just Weird (2nd)	80

I'm So Good at Lightning Rounds!	80

We Ate the Dingoes That Ate Your Baby	73

Cackling Grackles	51

Ampere	49

What a Way to Say Goodbye!

The Freshmaker

Hey there, my Little Weirdoes!

I write to you tonight one last time on behalf of the Little Dive Bar that Could, and I have to say it’s been a great run! There were no tears and no sadness, just a whole bunch of fun and nail-biting excitement as we rocked out our final quiz.

On this night, we were graced by the presence of many of our favorite regulars. Long ago, you may have come for the $2 tacos and the $3 beers (beat THAT deal any other establishment!), but over the last 18 months you’ve stayed for the quiz… and what a blast we’ve had. Tonight was no different, as our top three teams were separated by a single point at each scoring break. When the dust had settled, the manly men of They Will Take Our Trivia, But They Will Never Take Our FREEDOM! had taken the final title… but they freely admitted that they had a seventh person at their table who wasn’t playing. With a heavy heart, I declared them ineligible for the prizes, but still bought them a round of beers because they’re some awesome guys. And for what it’s worth they would have won the quiz legitimately. But you all know that I’m a stickler for the rules, so some more of our favorites got the bump in prizes!

Our 1^st prize winners for the night were (the awesomely named) Fuck You, Fuck You, Ron's Cool, Fuck You, I'm Out! These geniuses were no lower than second place the entire quiz, and pulled out he win thanks to a 12-11 score advantage of 2^nd place It's Not Over, It's Just Weird, who held on to take 2^nd after a tiebreaker. I found it quite amusing that there was still more quizzing to be done even after the final question. Very fitting, I say.

Thanks for the good times. Thanks for the uproarious chants. You didn’t have to do that, but it does make a quizmaster feel pretty good. Tuesday nights at Weirdo’s have been something I looked forward to so many times in the last year and a half. In fact, several quizmasters jockeyed to take this quiz should I have ever left it. See how much we like you guys? You make it so fun for all of us, so here’s my digital round of applause for you all.

CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP!

You earned it!

Be well my quiz friends. We’ll see you soon.

-Ron-

Weirdo's
12408 North Mopac Expressway
Austin, TX 78758
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11:31 PM, November 06, 2012


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Saw a Lot of Older Ladies Working the Poles Today	69

I Have a Full On Election Right Now	60

The Brett Favres	57

A/K/A	53

This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things	46

If You Have an Election That Lasts More Than Four Hours, Consult Your Physician

The Freshmaker

Happy Election Day, everybody!

I hope you did your civic duty and rocked the vote today. As I write this, we have confirmed that ol’ Barry will retain his position as leader of the free world for another four years. And regardless of how you fall on the political spectrum, I hope you will support the man as he guides the country for the next four years. One thing that I’ve never understood was how people can be resentful following elections. I get how you can be anti-Obama, but I hope you won’t be anti-America. Otherwise that’s akin to being anti-war and anti-the troops. Not cool, electorate. So let’s all get in line and back the dude. Rant over.

We had a small but playful band of quizzers holed up at Weirdo’s watching election results come in and enjoying a little pub quizardry. We had an audio round that proved you guys don’t like musical censorship (avg. score: 6.6/16), a visual round that proved you guys have great memories (avg. score: 7/8) and a brutal round on lilly-white Celtic nations in Britannia (avg. score: 2.2/8). Newcomers The Brett Favres had a shot to take home some quiz cash, if not for their mental breakdown in the visual round. In fact, they were the only team to miss a question in that round! With five minds looking over the round, you’d think breaking it down by quadrants would have made it easier, not harder… but what do I know?

In the end, it was Kimberly and Jenny coasting to a nine point victory (the only team to score two perfect rounds tonight) who secured the big win with their team Saw a Lot of Older Ladies Working the Poles Today. Way to go, girls! Speaking of gender, how interesting was it that our five teams were all broken down by gender? The all guy teams versus two all girl teams. With the ladies coming out on top, you’ve been put on notice, fellas!

We may be down to one quiz left at Weirdo’s, but you know it’s going to be a fun one, so I hope to see you all back in your seats next Tuesday at 8pm!

Weirdo's
12408 North Mopac Expressway
Austin, TX 78758
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12:22 AM, October 31, 2012


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Scores

No Sleep Till Trivia	71

The Couch Pulls Out But I Don't	69

I'm So Good at Lightning Rounds!	66

Hurricane Sandy Vagina	62

Cackling Grackles	53

Put 'Em On the Glass!

The Freshmaker

Yes, that’s just what Sir-Mix-a-Lot would have you do in the 90s… I guess he couldn’t think of a better follow up single to Baby Got Back. No, I don’t remember that one either. I guess it has gone down in the annals of history with other failed “hits,” like Mambo #6, There Went the Hot Stepper, Life Is a Freeway, and I’m Gonna Be (804 Kilometers). And speaking of that lost anthem to ta-tas, one of our teams took the liberty of shouting out the answer to R8 Q1 for all to hear. His reasoning? “Wasn’t this one of those questions you ask where you wanted us to tell you the answers?” Oh, how I miss you, new quizzers. I forget you guys aren’t so intimately familiar with our rules that you could recite them in your sleep!

Let’s say them again… just for old time’s sake:

1 – Don’t shout out the answers. If you shout out the correct answer, you handicap your own score by giving another team an answer they might not already have. Plus I have the microphone for a very special reason… because everyone wants to hear my melodious tones. My voice can make babies stop crying and can solve the European debt crisis. Yet I save it all for you. So do me a favor shut your genital lickers!

2 – Don’t fuck with the quizmaster. Whether you realize it or not, there’s only one person who has any say in what your final score will be on the quiz, and that’s the devastatingly handsome man with the microphone. And yes, tonight that devastatingly handsome man was wearing cargo shorts and a tank top. So sue me! I live free and easy. What was I saying? Oh yes… if you mess with the integrity of the quiz, or anyone else’s good time, you become subject to having your night ruined by an impromptu microphone prostate exam.

3 – The quiz is fixed. Fuck with me and find out if you still win. Don’t like the answers I accepted? Take it to the website. We pay people to listen to your grievances there, not during the quiz. If I can fix an obvious error, I will. But if you supply some third tier disputably correct answer to a question, don’t expect me to just take your word for it. If we determine you’re right, I’ll make good with a beer and a handy jay next time I see you. Just don’t be a fatty.

4 – No more than six people to a team. Most of you guys are really good about this, but here’s your refresher. If you have seven people at your table but one of them isn’t playing, then you have seven people on your team. It’s just that simple. Either you split up in to multiple teams, play disqualified, or do something unspeakably dirty sexually to the quizmaster for a one week exception to this rule. I do, however, reserve the right to deny you that extra team member following services rendered. So you better do a freakishly good job.

You all know about no phones on the quiz, correct? I hope I don’t need to spell that one out for you, too!

Again, just thought this might be a great time for a little rules refresher. Thanks for listening!

Tonight, we had an incredibly close contest between regulars No Sleep Till Trivia and newbies The Couch Pulls Out, But I Don't. You know how I knew you were newbies? Because you violated rule number five…

5 – The quizmaster reserves the right to ridicule you, alter your team name and wish a pox upon your family if you ever use one of the “forcibly retired” team names. If you think you’re the first person to come up with “Quizzed In My Pants,” “My Couch Pulls Out, But I Don’t,” “Car Ramrod,” or any of a hundred similar names, you’re not. These haven’t been original in the last decade plus, so please… for the love of all that I hold dear… never use one of these names!

I’m glad I got that out of my system.

Thanks guys.

Oh, by the way… two more quizzes, then we’re done at Weirdo’s. Sad to say.

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