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Complete Quiz Schedule
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Blue Star Cafe & Pub
4512 Stone Way North
Seattle, WA 98103
Mondays: 8:00 PM
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11:29 PM, July 21, 2014
We All Still Have Jobs 81

Wu Tang is for the Children 79

Not Great, Bob! 77

Sorry Your Game Was So Messi 71

Bloody Murder 70

What Makes You Think I Won't Cut You? 69

Dr. Spaceman 69

We Have No Friends 63

Just The Two of Us 60

My Couch Pulls Out But I Don't 60

Daleks are the quizmasters of earth 60

DJ Travesty 58

Unicorns I Love Them 46

Ivan the Adequate


Quiz Schedule
Ivan (Ivan the Adequate)

How great are those new Weird Al songs? Most people I know seem to be flocking to "Word Crimes" or "Handy," but my personal favorite off the new album is "NOW That's What I Call Polka," in which he does a stylized medley of a handful of hits from recent years - everything from "Wrecking Ball" to "Pumped Up Kicks." 

That song is so good that, when I played it off my background music playlist tonight during a scoring break, one quizzer walked all the way up to the speaker to listen closely to it.

Everybody has their favorite Weird Al track, with "Amish Paradise" being the crown jewel of his older stuff while the youngsters seem to be more familiar with the (relatively) recent "White & Nerdy." I myself will always be faithful to "The Saga Begins," the Star Wars parody that I consider so prolific that I will regularly sing its lyrics in place of "American Pie" during karaoke.

What a genius, that man. It's one thing to keep making popular song parodies for three decades; it's another to keep making them despite your very craft being consistently replicated by Youtubers and other artists who are able to pump up similar stuff in no time at all. He's just got that magic something.

Another great quiz tonight despite the further absence of Colin (or perhaps because of it). 

The victory of the evening was achieved through a very strategic use of the joker by the winners We All Still Have Jobs, who snuck their way up from 6th place after the deciding Round 8.

See you next time, gang.

Blue Star Cafe & Pub
4512 Stone Way North
Seattle, WA 98103
Mondays: 8:00 PM
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11:48 PM, July 14, 2014
Dr Who Into Darkness Ft. Dalek Caan 85

Wild Sockeye Salmson with Sauce Vierge 84

We Won't Lose as Bad as Brazil 80

Dr Spaceman 80

What Makes You Think I Won't Cut You? 78

Ninja Turtles 72

Purple Monkey Diswasher 72

Doctor Whom 71

Not Great, Bob! 71

Beyonce Voters 65

The Golden Snatches 64

French Canadians Suck 64

Double Date 59

Destination Friendship 56

Seattle Do Pig, Seattle Do 54

Doing it, tooing it well 53

OMG! The Banana Stand is On Fire! No Touching!!! 53

Being An Adult Sucks 46

Ivan the Adequate


Quiz Schedule
Ivan (Ivan the Adequate)

Before tonight’s quiz, I sent Colin an email to see if he’d be interested in Skyping in from Brazil again. The exchange went as follows:

Ivan (7:33): Want to read a round tonight?

Colin (7:30): Naw I'm good. Also really drunk so it wouldn't go all that well. Plusfuck Miskitos.

Ivan (7:43): I'll be sharing these updates with the bar. Probably on the blog as well.

Colin (7:56): Sounds good. Wait updates?

There you have it, ladies and gentleman. Colin is alive, presumably not kidnapped, and happily inebriated. We can all breathe easy for another week.

And now onto the quiz.

A lot of people (read: the media) have been going crazy about the supposed “heat wave” that Seattle is engulfed in at the moment.

Look, I grew up here in the Pacific Northwest. I hide from the sun, only grow stronger in the rain, and loathe just about any extreme weather. But temperatures below 90 do not justify the use of the phrase “heat wave.” Another testament to the further demise of local broadcast media – that is, if it’s even possible for a demise to continue past “dead and irrelevant.”

Having said that, 18 teams packed the Blue Star on what was admittedly a very warm summer night in Seattle – the kind of night that brings friends together and also makes you slightly less angry over the existence of bands like “Fun.”

The quiz was a competitive one, with many teams tripped up by the podcast-centric audio round. It was really divisive; you either knew it or you didn’t. Still, there were a few very unhappy teams when this round demolished their scores. They were even less happy when I revealed that I was the one who put together this round.

One team that got hit hardest was There’s Always Money In The Banana Stand, which became There’s No More Money in the Banana Stand, which then became OMG! The banana stand is on fire! No Touching! Kudos to them for owning up to their defeat.

Tonight’s victors were the sci-fi mash-up Dr Who Into Darkness Ft. Dalek Caan, which was one of two Doctor Who-themed team names and one of three team names beginning with the word doctor.

See you next Monday, my beloved Blue Star.

Blue Star Cafe & Pub
4512 Stone Way North
Seattle, WA 98103
Mondays: 8:00 PM
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11:30 PM, July 07, 2014
Spoilers Sweetie 84

Colin: Still Not dead as of June 15th 78

Not Great, Bob! 76

A Team Named Slickback 74

Manila Clams Gremolata 68

My Couch Pulls Out But I Don't 68

Drinkers With A Curling Problem 64

Arthur 2Sheds Jackson 50

The Mocha Holes 50

#isitfridayyet 45

Strexcorp 45

We Might Lose, But We Sure Know To Booze 42

Ivan the Adequate


Quiz Schedule
Ivan (Ivan the Adequate)

Tonight’s winning team’s name references Doctor Who in a particularly apropos way, as it was announced today that the scripts for the first five episodes of the upcoming season (or series, if you want to be British/obnoxious about it) have leaked online in their entirety. The BBC has pleaded fans who have gotten their hands on the scripts to not spoil it for everyone else.

Who needs those scripts to tell them what’s going to happen anyway? I can predict for you, without even reading them, what you can expect in the new batch of episodes:


  1. Clara will remain one-dimensional, and the BBC will continue to block any and all efforts to turn her into a real character rather than just a plot point (fun/depressing fact: The awesome Victorian version of Clara was supposed to go on to be the full-time companion, but the BBC prevented Steven Moffat from moving forward with that plan because they wanted a relatable, modern-day, Mary Sue version of the character instead. And look how compelling that’s been.)
  2. Speaking of Moffat, he will continue to come up with intriguing one-off story ideas while failing to provide any satisfying clarity or resolution to his long-term story arcs.
  3. People who have held off on watching the show up until now will continue to do so in light of the show’s number one deterrent for bringing in new fans at this point: the current fans (particularly of the Tumblr variety).
  4. The Daleks will be back, and their current status/relationship with the Doctor/origin will once again be muddied up and inconsistent with where they were and what they’ve been doing in past seasons.
  5. Peter Capaldi will be a fuckin’ awesome Doctor.


Bold predictions, I know.

The aforementioned winning team, Spoilers Sweetie, managed to snag a healthy lead for first place with only three team members and without even having jokered their highest-scoring round. Kudos to them.

Honorable mention goes to second-place Colin: Still Not Dead as of June 15th for providing me with a status update regarding whether or not I’ll continue to take over at the Blue Star full time after September.

Speaking of Colin, we’ll have to have him Skype in to read another round next week now that the World Cup is winding down and he will presumably have nothing to do in Brazil after next week.

See you all again next Monday.

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